Blog 53 – Buddy and Me – Project 3 (5th – 18th September 2011)

Who Is Steve Heath
A Message To The President of South Africa.
Factors Contributing To The Increase In Child Rape.
A Proposed Solution To Stopping The Rape And Sexual Abuse Of Children in SA.

To watch Buddy and Me in real time click here, select South Africa under “Global Fleet Logins:” in the left hand panel, enter cellphone number 0822549129 and password Buddy.

To make a donation to or information on any of the organisations involved in assisting victims of child rape and abuse, please click on one of the following links:

Beares
Lubners
Bobbi Bear Foundation (KwaZulu-Natal)
The Teddy Bear Clinic (Gauteng)
The TygerBear Foundation (Western Cape)
GRIP (Mpumalanga)
StepThru (Gauteng)

  • To see the ‘Buddy and Me’ scheduled itinerary details for the period 30th August – 4th October 2011 see blog 50
  • To read the shocking details of the Upington horror story – The Hynie Dick Story – regarding the ‘Upington savage pedophile’ see blog 35
  • To read details of the ‘savage’ the police are looking for in connection with the rape of a 3 year little girl, see blog 39
  • To read the heart breaking story by a mother (Cathy Kenney) of the rape of  her 3 year-old daughter see blog 38
  • To read the storey of Natasha who at 10 years-of age was brutally raped and murdered and after serving a very short portion of his sentence, the ‘State’ wants to release the savage who did it, from prison, see blog 10 (November 2010)
  • To read ‘Birds’ story about her incredible courage to face her ‘step-father’ who she looked up to and loved as a ‘father’ who abused her and her love, as told by her mother – Elise – see blog 42

 

Wow so what can I say, this past 2 weeks have proved to be the worst, most traumatising weeks of the entire 6 year 187 000 kilometres done on the ‘Buddy and Me’ project, and because of this I have to ask for forgiveness for not posting a blog for the passed 2 weeks or so, but once you hear my storey I am sure you will understand why!! Part of the trauma was the fact that on Friday night (9th September) I was robbed of my BlackBerry cell phone which had all my photo’s for the week on it, I usually down load the photo’s from the cell phone to my laptop on the weekend and so because the phone was stolen on the Friday night, guess what? No photo’s, I did however manage to salvage a couple from my ‘Face Book’ and from June’s (The lady in my life) pictures she took while she was with me for a couple of days, so without any further ado let me tell you what happened in the lives of ‘Buddy and Me’ this past 2 weeks.

So we start on Monday morning the 5th of September when ‘Buddy and Me’ visited the Beares store in Temba City where the store manager, Prince Nkosi arranged for me to meet some interesting people in the form of the Commanding officer of the SAPS-FCS unit, Captain Johannes Biloane who provided me with some really interesting information and facts on what is happening in the area regarding the rape and sexual abuse of children, which by the way is happening at a humongous rate.

He agreed that the fact that the courts are ordering that victims of child rape and domestic violence must be removed from their place of residence, in the situation where the father / husband is the perpetrator, and that the victim be placed in a ‘place of safety’ is not only wrong, but is in contravention of the ‘Sexual Offences Act” which states that “The perpetrator must be removed and that he has to ensure that his contribution to sustaining the family is continued as normal”. He also agreed fully that if government committed themselves to stopping the rape of children in South Africa and implemented the ‘solution’ I have proposed, this would be a major step in the right direction to encouraging mothers to report the rape of their children and to encourage twomen to report the abuse of themselves as well, and so eradicating the scourge of child rape from our society. (To the Beares staff of Temba City, my sincere apologies for no photo guys)

From Temba City, ‘Buddy and Me’ proceeded to the Beares store in Mabopane where once again ‘Buddy and Me’ were welcomed like long lost relatives by the friendly Beares staff. Here I got to speak to yet more police and Social Workers who confirmed that the rape and sexual abuse in the area is really “bad” and that they have a major shortage of staff in the form of ‘trained’ Forensic Social Workers’ who are supposed to do the initial report and open the docket in the situation of rape and domestic violence. (Again apologies for no photo)

After a hot day in the townships, I managed to find my way back to Pretoria and checked in to the lovely Protea Centurion Waterfront Hotel

where after checking in I relaxed on the veranda.

Tuesday morning found ‘Buddy and Me’ visiting Daisy Phetla, the store manager of Beares Mahube Max City, and her group of friendly staff where I got to speak to a really interesting group of people from the local community who after being provided with details of my ‘proposal for a Solution to Stopping the Rape and Sexual Abuse of Children’ agreed that our government must commit themselves by implementing my proposal.

This was followed up with a visit to the Beares store which has always produced amazing things for ‘Buddy and Me’ in the past and that is the Silverton Beares store where Daleen Diedericks, the store Manager did an absolutely sterling job in arranging for a group of people to pop in and chat to me. The group included, apart from others, two really interesting and dedicated ladies who are social workers with an NGO called ‘METT Therapy Centre’ as well as a member of the SAPS-FCS unit and the information which was shared was amazing. I am just really disappointed that I lost the photos from this store in particular, so to Daleen and your staff you have my heartfelt apologies for not being able to post the photos of the day.

I was told by Sannika Nel and Lizahane Greef of METT Therapy NGO, that the children who are mostly referred to them, are referred by teachers and parents who notice behavioural changes in children and after counselling it is usually – mostly – identified that the child is, or has been, raped or molested. These ladies have read my proposal for a solution and have emailed me their opinions and comments, which by the way are in full support of my proposal for a solution, so thanks ladies for taking the time to read it and for conveying your opinions and incredible encouragement, it’s sincerely appreciated.

Wednesday ‘Buddy and Me’ visited that incredibly bubbly lady, Helena De Lange and her friendly staff at the Beares Pretoria North store. Whenever I have visited this store on the two previous ‘Buddy and Me’ projects Helena has really out done herself in arranging an amazing day for me and Buddy and on this occasion it was no exception. I got to chat to a group which included members of the police and as usual, as I do at all store visits, I presented everyone with copies of what I believe is the solution to stopping the rape and sexual abuse of children in South Africa and after having presented them with a verbal shortened version of it, they were unanimous in their agreement that if applied it would undoubtedly have a major impact on eradicating child rape from our society, so it is encouraging and comforting to know that I am on the right track and that the 187 000 kilometres ‘Buddy and Me’ have travelled on this project together have been worthwhile J Now it’s just to get government and the relative ‘stakeholder’ to commit to it L that is going to be the daunting task of ‘Buddy and Me – Project 4- The final chapter’ which I hope to start in February 2012.

Thursday (8th September) ‘Buddy and Me’ visited the Beares store in Gezina where Jesse The-Kisho and her staff made June (who joined me for a couple of days to find out exactly what a day in the life of ‘Buddy and Me’ was like) and I very welcome, and I got to chat to one of the most interesting groups of people I have had the pleasure of meeting on this project. The group included, apart from others, a lady whose daughter was raped at the age of 8 and a few days before our meeting, at the age of 25 was once again raped, but this time – murdered!! A really heart wrenching story and June unfortunately had to be subjected to this on her first ‘official’ day on the ‘Buddy and Me’ project. So to Jesse and your wonderful staff, many thanks for making my visit to the Gezina Beares store the great pleasure it always is, just sorry I lost the photos through someone’s greedy fingers L

From Gezina “Buddy and Me” headed for the Beares store in Arcadia, and on arriving outside the store we were greeted by Linda Muller, the store manager and her bevy of lovely ladies who were all standing at the door to great us.

Fortunately June also took a photo with her cell phone and so I can provide a picture of all the lovely ladies of Beares Arcadia, mmm maybe I should consider keeping June (other wise known to me as Wonder- Woman J) on the project permanently?

 

 I got to address and chat to yet another incredibly interesting group of people and got some really interesting comments and opinions.

One subject in particular was the now ‘controversial’ question which I have been asking women for their opinions on, since the male police officer told me a few weeks back, that “women in general prefer to be interviewed by a male in the traumatic situation of reporting a rape case and that women in general prefer to have the very personal J88 forensic examination done by a male doctor rather than a female doctor” his reasoning being that “women believe that females doing these tasks are more judgmental than men?”.

Since obtaining this opinion and asking many woman this question, the response has been that 70% of women would prefer a female to do the report interview and 100% of women would prefer a female doctor to undertake the examination, and in this particular discussion it was established that as far as the reporting aspect is concerned I think I can safely say 90% of the women preferred a female doing the report and 100% would prefer a female doing the examination. I would sincerely like to obtain opinions on this point so you can send them to me via my email: steve@buddyandme.co.za

Friday, (9th of September) was the day all my dramas started! It began with a visit, or rather the intention of a visit, to the Beares store in Van der Walt street, which is in the ‘middle’ of Pretoria and so being a Friday things were somewhat chaotic to put it mildly! The streets around the store were bedlam, and there were taxi’s buzzing all around ‘Buddy and Me’ hooting and drivers shouting from all sides, obviously with all of this chaos there was absolutely no chance of getting a parking and to cap it all there were about 20 traffic cops pulling cars and taxi’s over for inspections and shouting at me to “move on” and I was obviously only too happy to oblige. With all of this chaos going on I elected to give the Beares in Van der Walt street store a miss and move on to the next one, Beares Pretoria City which is in Andries street central Pretoria and where although it was also somewhat chaotic, was not quite the bedlam seen at the Van der Walt street store and I even managed to get a parking right in-front of the store, incredible!!!

I got to spend some quality time chatting to that incredibly lovely lady, Lilly Luiz the store manager of the Andries Street Beares store and her friendly staff and had a really lovely time with them bringing them up to speed on what is happening with the project and what I hope to achieve with it.

Unfortunately June (Wonder-Woman) had elected to stay at the resort we were camping at; Roos se Oordt on the Crocodile River leading into Hartebeespoort Dam at Broederstroom,

 

 because we had been told that thieves had been operating in the area recently so she elected to stay behind and look after the camp, a very brave woman indeed J, and so she was not around to take photos with her camera (cell phone) as well and so the photos of the Beares staff in Andries Street are gone as well, really sorry guys, but greedy fingers prevail L

Now this where all my drama started!! Saturday morning I woke and reached for my cell phone (Sponsored BlackBerry) which is always on the table next to my bed, and discovered it was not there, I jumped up and frantically started searching for it but it was gone. We later heard that thieves had stolen cooler boxes and other items of personal stuff from inside other camper’s tents during the night and so I was devastated.

My immediate course of action was to go into the Quaggas Centre in Pretoria where I phoned the BlackBerry help line from the Beares store and black listed and blocked my BlackBerry phone. Then I visited the cell phone shop in the centre and blocked my ‘Cell C’ sim card and got a new one issued with my number ported so I have retained the same cell number.

I was obviously devastated by the loss and so June and I decided to pop into the ‘Bush Pub’ which is situated about 50 metres from ‘Roos se Oordt’ resort entrance and hopefully get a bit of spark back into my life by watching the Sharks beat the Pumas, which is exactly what happened, the only good thing I experienced the entire weekend!! Then dramas really struck!!

When I attempted to leave the ‘Bush Pub’ Buddy would not engage gears. Everything had been perfectly great up until that moment and for no apparent reason when I put him into gear he just revved and would not pull away. A chap from the ‘Bush Pub’ towed us back to camp, but unfortunately the tow rope was tied to Buddy’s steering stabilizer bar and this was pulled off while being towed. A friend in Johannesburg, Jaco Labuschagne offered to send two of his guys to tow us to Jo’burg the next day and as promised they arrived at 12:30pm on Sunday.

My ‘Good Samaritan’s’ from Jo’burg trying to refit Buddy’s stabilizer bar which eventually was strapped to Buddy’s front bumper in desperation.

Preparing to tow ‘Buddy and Me’ to Jo’burg.

All was going well with the towing until we reached the halfway point to Jo’burg on a dual highway Buddy’s back right wheel came flying off!!!. It was discovered that the guy who had done Buddy’s brakes for me in Upington had not put a split pin into the wheel hub bolt and had not tightened the hub nut enough and this had worked loose and had caused the splines on Buddy’s drive shaft and wheel hub to be grinded smooth, hence no traction when the gears were engaged, and finally resulting in the wheel flying off.

Unfortunately with the two vehicles being attached by the tow rope, Buddy was jerked savagely into the left side of the bakkie which was towing Buddy and resulted in the bakkie sustaining some serious damage.

 

After some ‘fancy foot work’ by me ‘the roadside mechanic’ and my ‘Good Samaritans’

 we managed to get the wheel back on and June

(that’s her taking a picture of me taking a picture of her) and I remained with Buddy while my ‘Good Samaritans’ towed the trailer to Jo’burg and returned a couple of hours later to tow Buddy, June and myself to Jo’burg. Later that evening after a hair raising and scary tow because there were only two wheel nuts holding Buddy’s right rear wheel on,

we arrived safely at our destination in Germiston.

The next four days were spent frantically running around trying to get Buddy’s damaged wheel hub and drive shaft replaced, as well as the front steering stabilizer repaired without having to cancel too many scheduled appointments, not to mention the major expense damage to Buddy’s very depleted medical aid/fuel budget, so this resulted in some night work for me.

Fortunately with a lot of help from my friends, Jaco Labuschagne, his fiancé Celeste Grobler and Jaco’s brother Harm, I managed to get the job accomplished and only had to cancel my visits to two Beares store, these being Midrand and Tsakane and on Thursday morning ‘Buddy and Me’ headed out of Germiston for our scheduled visit to the Beares stores in Secunda.

Unfortunately dramas in my life did not end with my departure from Germiston, because soon after arriving at the Beares store in Secunda Fishers Square, the store manager, Valerie O’Neil was given the frantic news by her up-stairs staff that the water pipe in the stores kitchen had sheared and water was pouring out at a mean rate. The mains was switched off and after a few hours, and some frantic running around and phoning for a plumber, which ended at around 6pm, a solution was obtained and the pipe was blocked because the restaurant/pub next door insisted on the water being switched back on.

 I must tell you that Val and her husband Eugene who is the Beares store Manager at the Bethal Beares store did an amazing thing to help me out of my cell phone predicament, they presented me with one of their ‘spare’ personal cell phones which has internet and camera facilities which is going to help me tremendously, so many thanks guys you have my heartfelt thanks for that.

After a visit to the friendly staff of the Beares (ii) store in Steyn Street Secunda, where I spent some quality time chatting to Peggy Matlals and her friendly staff

 I headed for ‘home’ which in this instance was the home of Round Tabler Clint Palmer.

Thursday evening was spent attending a Round Table meeting in Bethal with the Round Tablers of Secunda and as usual the evening turned out to be a humdinger!

 the guys even took me to a local pub to show me what Buddy has been doing behind my back

Friday, after having my badly cracked windscreen replaced by PG in Secunda (courtesy of Round Tabler Gawie Haremse – RT Secunda)  which had been smashed by a rock about 2 months back;

I had been warned on a few occasions by police that I was going to be fined if it was not replaced, I headed out of town to meet an incredibly wonderful guy, who happens to also be a ‘character of note’ Round Tabler, 41er Chris Hoarse and together with Round Tablers Neville Kotze and Mattheus Prinsloo (RT Secunda Chairman), presented me with the Round Table Secunda ‘new and improved’ banner and lapel pin

 That’s ‘mean machine-character of note’ Chris Hoarse on the right of the picture.

My next stop was in Kriel where I spent some time talking to Stella Landman and her staff at the Beares store

and then drove the short distance to Bethal where I visited Eugene O’Neil – husband of Valerie O’Neil in the Secunda Beares store – and collected my ‘new’ internet connected cell phone from him.

 After a short but interesting visit with these friendly people I made a hurried departure from the chaotic, Friday afternoon peak hour traffic of Bethal and headed out on the Ermelo road where on reaching Ermelo I turned left and headed for the quiet and peaceful area of Chrissiesmeer which is 40 kilometres north of Ermelo where I hoped to spend a relaxing weekend trying to recover from the past weeks drama’s – please note I said “hoped”.

The cottage I stayed in is owned by good friends of mine, Rotarian Cheryl and Horst Reum and if you remember, while I was in White River, Horst worked on Buddy in his workshop and they took me to the Kruger Park for the day.

Cheryl and Horst arrived for the weekend on Saturday afternoon but unfortunately on Saturday night, due to water I had drunk in Bethal, I was struck down with severe water poisoning during Saturday evening and so was not very good conversational material on Sunday and in-fact spent the whole day running between my bed and toilet puking my heart out. Fortunately on Monday morning I woke feeling somewhat better, but very weak and my right kidney, in particular, felt like a mule had kicked me in the right side of my back.

A new Face Book site has been set up for ‘Buddy and Me’: ‘Stop the Rape and Sexual Abuse of Children in SA’ and we welcome everyone to visit it from time to time, and for this I owe a great thanks to June Porter- “Wonder-Woman” for her support and dedication to the ‘Buddy and Me’ (especially the ‘Me’ part) project and for setting it up. Thanks Babes you and your support are sincerely appreciated.

So that now brings you up to date on the lives of ‘Buddy and Me’, so I hope you have all had a far better 2 weeks than me and that this coming week brings you nothing but joy, happiness and productivity J So keep well, stay safe and I look forward to receiving your comments, constructive criticism and opinions on what needs to be done to stop the rape and sexual abuse of children in South Africa, Oh and don’t forget KEEP ALL CHILDREN SAFE, because in-spite of what our government thinks, children are our countries greatest assets and as such need to be protected.

Caring regards from

Buddy (The Beach Buggy)

And

Me’ (Steve Heath)

Please send comments and opinions to: steve@buddyandme.co.za

Please note that all comments and opinions on the ‘Buddy and Me’ website and blogs are those of Steve Heath and not those of the sponsors to the “Buddy and Me’ project.

Blog 52 – Buddy and Me – Project 3 (29th August – 4th September 2011)

Who Is Steve Heath
A Message To The President of South Africa.
Factors Contributing To The Increase In Child Rape.
A Proposed Solution To Stopping The Rape And Sexual Abuse Of Children in SA.

To watch Buddy and Me in real time click here, select South Africa under “Global Fleet Logins:” in the left hand panel, enter cellphone number 0822549129 and password Buddy.

To make a donation to or information on any of the organisations involved in assisting victims of child rape and abuse, please click on one of the following links:

Beares
Lubners
Bobbi Bear Foundation (KwaZulu-Natal)
The Teddy Bear Clinic (Gauteng)
The TygerBear Foundation (Western Cape)
GRIP (Mpumalanga)
StepThru (Gauteng)

  • To see the ‘Buddy and Me’ scheduled itinerary details for the period 30th August – 4th October 2011 see blog 50
  • To read the shocking details of the Upington horror story – The Hynie Dick Story – regarding the ‘Upington savage pedophile’ see blog 35
  • To read details of the ‘savage’ the police are looking for in connection with the rape of a 3 year little girl, see blog 39
  • To read the heart breaking story by a mother (Cathy Kenney) of the rape of  her 3 year-old daughter see blog 38
  • To read the storey of Natasha who at 10 years-of age was brutally raped and murdered and after serving a very short portion of his sentence, the ‘State’ wants to release the savage who did it, from prison, see blog 10 (November 2010)
  • To read ‘Birds’ story about her incredible courage to face her ‘step-father’ who she looked up to and loved as a ‘father’ who abused her and her love, as told by her mother – Elise – see blog 42

 

So after a great weekend, with the Round Tablers of Loskop RT233 which included a magnificent poitjie cooked by passed Round Table President 2000/1 Jaco Van Staaten on Sunday afternoon,

 (That’s Jaco bending over sampling his ‘brew’) Monday morning found ‘Buddy and Me’ visiting the staff at the Groblersdal Beares store and what an incredible day they organised for me.

 I got to address a very large group of people and we had a really tremendous open discussion on why child rape is occurring and what needs to be done to stop it.

Obviously I could not exclude Buddy from the days activities because he would extract his anger out on me later while out on the open road, so the kids climbed all over him and showered him with love and affection.

 After listening to the kids reciting poems they had written for me and watched a street play on abuse of woman and children performed by the kids, I bid farewell to the guests and Beares staff and headed out of Groblersdal in the direction of Middelburg.

My evening’s accommodation was courtesy of Middelburg Round Tabler Chairman Mathew Abraham and his lovely family

and after a Round Table function at the Middelburg Country Club

I fell into bed that night a little before midnight in a blissful deep sleep, something I had not enjoyed in weeks.

Tuesday morning I headed for the Middelburg Beares store

and on entering the store, the store manager, Sizwe Sibiya told me the bad news that the store had suffered a break in that evening, the incredible thing was that when he had reached the store after reacting to the alarm, the thieves were still inside the store and when the polkice arrived on the scene he pointed this out to them but they would not enter the store because “they did not know how many of them were inside, or if they were armed and so they were ‘reluctant’ to enter the premises”. During the discussions about whether they should enter the premises or not the thieves escaped out the rear of the store, incredible!!! But in-spite of this he and his staff ensured that my visit to the Middelburg was a success and I thoroughly enjoyed myself. I got to meet two members of the local SAPS-FCS unit a male and a female and unfortunately got into a bit of a heated discussion with the male police officer.

I have become quite tired and perplexed hearing all the ‘excuses’ why children are being raped and these include such things as “poverty”, the “housing conditions”, “un-employment” “culture” and God knows what else, and my guest police officer from the Middelburg SAPS-FCS unit was going off and saying “We will never stop the rape and sexual abuse of children unless poverty is removed from our society and everyone is employed and given good jobs salaries and everyone is given nice big houses to live in”. My response was “well, when all of that happens, pigs will fly and Durban will be covered in a metre of snow, so must we all sit back and let it happen until the impossible happens” RIGHT!! And this was a statement being made by one of our esteemed police officers?? I also pointed out that children are being raped by wealthy, educated men in top jobs living in big fancy houses, so what is his excuse for these savages??

From Middelburg it was a short drive through to Witbank where I first visited the Beares store in the centre of town which is managed by the energetic Dee Mokoena.

Dee organised one of the most interesting groups of people I have had the pleasure of talking to on this project

 and it consisted of two ladies by the names of Antoinette Diener and Zelda Heyns as well as a really interesting man by the name of Vivian Trollip all of the NGO ‘Victim Support Witbank’. My discussion with these three people produced some incredible information and I obtained some really tremendous opinions and comments on the subject of child rape.

One of the topics discussed confirmed the fact that the Thuthuzela Care centre which is situated at the local Provincial Hospital is exactly the same as all those I have visited to date and is a total waste of time and money. I have been promised an email outlining the problems experienced with the Thuthuzela Care Centre and I will be posting this as a separate blog once I receive it, so stay tuned for this.

One of the other issues discussed is the fact that – and I have personally witnessed this in many centres I have visited – places where ‘vulnerable’ children are kept are often incorrectly named. I have often visited what have been referred to and called “Safe Houses” only to discover that the children at the centre are in-fact not children requiring ‘safe keeping’ as in kids who have been subjected to rape, sexual abuse or any other form abuse and need to be removed from a dangerous environment, but are in-fact abandoned, neglected, HIV infected and in many cases orphan kids and so the centres are in-fact ‘Shelters’ and not “Places of Safety”. 

 

Then it was brief stop-over at the Witbank Lubners store to say hi to Peter Dlamini and his staff.

 Here even the guy who offered to wash Buddy got in the show.

My final visit to the Witbank area was to the Beares store in Klipfontein where the store manager, Yolandé Muller organised a magic visit for me. This included meeting and chatting to a few ladies running a ‘Place of Safety’ called “Highveld House – Place of Safety’ as well as two more members of the local SAPS-FCS unit. This time the discussion took a completely different route to the one I had had in Middelburg, and when I told them about my Middelburg discussion their response was one of total shock. They could not believe that ‘anyone’ could make such a “stupid” comment.

They agreed, as has all the police officers I have spoken to, that there is absolutely no reason, as far as they are aware of, why a child rape case (cases involving children under the age of 12 years of age) cannot be taken to court / trial immediately on completion of the investigation and identification of the perpetrator and take precedence over all other cases on the court list and be placed number one on the court list. In doing so the child can give evidence immediately and can then be saved the extreme trauma associated with the case being drawn out, as is currently occurring, for periods of up to 3 – 5 years. Once the trial has been completed, the case can stand down awaiting verdict pending the results of the DNA forensic tests.

The same applies to the forensic testing of DNA. At present, or so it has been told to me by police officers, the testing of DNA in child rape cases currently takes anything between 18 months and up to 3 years to obtain. This totally unacceptable situation is the main reason why cases are taking so long to get to trial and so I would like to know, as would many police offices, why can’t DNA testing on child rape cases be given precedence over all other DNA testing in the interests of removing the trauma and stress the children are being subjected to.

At present social workers/counsellors with NGO’s and such likes are not allowed to counsel a child rape victim in order to help the child overcome the trauma he or she has been subjected to through the rape, as this could be ‘detrimental to the case’, and so I stand-by my statement that I believe the ‘system’ itself is guilty of child abuse.

While in Klipfontein (Witbank) I had a stunning interview with the local radio station.

So meet DJ Lundi Janse Van Rensburg and Marius, the reaction to the interview was incredible and I have received many sms’s, e-mails and phone calls from listeners, so many thanks to those concerned citizens for your kind words of encouragement and opinions.

Yolundé, the Beares store manger in Klipfontein also asked me to present Ms. Annemarie Van de Linde of the ‘Highveld House – Place of Safety’ with a box of ‘goodies’ for the kids in the home.

 Then it was time to bid farewell to the Beares staff of Klipfontein

and head to Jo’burg.

My final visit for the week was to the Brits area where I first visited the Beares store in the centre of town

 and if you look very carefully you will see a little face peeping out on the right of the picture wearing one of my ‘Buddy and Me’ blue jackets and ‘bush’ cap, that is ‘Wonder Woman’- June Porter who insisted on being subjected to the rough conditions of driving in Buddy to get first hand experience of the ‘Buddy and Me’ research project. Here I had a tremendous visit with that dynamic lady, the store manager Sylvia Pretorius (The stunning blond leaning against Buddy, holding the other stunning blond Marie in-front of her) and her energetic staff and I got to meet two more SAPS-FCS who provided me with yet another perspective on why child rape is occurring and what needs to be done to stop it.

My interview with these two SAPS-FCS unit members produced some information which once again completely floored me and I would sincerely appreciate comments on this opinion from, in particular, women. The statement that was made by a male police officer was that “Women and children rape victims prefer being interviewed by men and to have the J88 forensic physical examination done by a male rather than a female doctor”.

This statement, as I said, totally floored me because in all interviews I have had with women and mothers of child rape victims, it has been made abundantly clear, that one of the reasons they are not reporting the rape of themselves and their children is because they refuse to subject themselves and their small children to the humiliating situation of having to explain, in detail, the details of the rape after having had a member of the male species subject them to the degrading and embarrassing circumstances of the rape, and then to have a member of the same species – as in a male – undertake a very personal examination!! I therefore look forward to receiving your comments on this statement.

Then it was time for my final Beares store visit for the week and this was to the Beares store in Brits at the Platinum Mall and this involved ‘Buddy and Me’ driving through the centre of the Mall and attracting the attention of all the shoppers who were waving and calling out greetings as we drove through.

The charismatic fellow lying on Buddy’s ‘roof’ structure is Goitsemodimo Mogolegang, a presenter with a local radio station – Letlhabile Community Radio 99.5 Fm – man those names are a mouth full J The interesting thing is that his first name Goitsemodimo means “God only knows”, fortunately he has an abbreviated name “Goitse” which I presume means “God”

 

By the time we extracted ourselves from the bustling Brits traffic it was twenty to four and so by the time we reached Jo’burg at 5pm the chaotic peak hour Friday traffic was in full swing, so a nice relaxing weekend with my good friends Jaco Labuschagne and Celeste Grobler has been a pleasure.

So until next week when ‘Buddy and Me’ hit the streets of Pretoria, ‘Buddy and Me’ will bid you farewell, so keep well and stay safe and of course PLEASE KEEP ALL CHILDREN SAFE!!!!

Caring regards from

Buddy (The Beach Buggy)

And

Me’ (Steve Heath)

Please send your comments and opinions to: steve@buddyandme.co.za

Please note that all comments and opinions on the ‘Buddy and Me’ website and blogs are those of Steve Heath and not those of the sponsors to the ‘Buddy and Me’ project.

Blog 50 – Buddy and Me – Project 3 (Final leg schedule)

Who Is Steve Heath
A Message To The President of South Africa.
Factors Contributing To The Increase In Child Rape.
A Proposed Solution To Stopping The Rape And Sexual Abuse Of Children in SA.

To watch Buddy and Me in real time click here, select South Africa under “Global Fleet Logins:” in the left hand panel, enter cellphone number 0822549129 and password Buddy.

To make a donation to or information on any of the organisations involved in assisting victims of child rape and abuse, please click on one of the following links:

Beares
Lubners
Bobbi Bear Foundation (KwaZulu-Natal)
The Teddy Bear Clinic (Gauteng)
The TygerBear Foundation (Western Cape)
GRIP (Mpumalanga)
StepThru (Gauteng)

‘Buddy and Me’

Itinerary for

Beares and Lubners store visits

Store Beares/Lubners  Date at store Time at store  
Middelburg Beares 30 Aug 10:00 – 13:00
Witbank Beares 31 Aug 10:00 – 12:30
Witbank Lubners 31 Aug 13:00 – 14:30
Witbank Beares 31 Aug 15:00 – 16:30
Brits Beares 2 Sept 11:00 – 13:30
Brits (Platinum Mall) Beares 2 Sept 14:15 – 15:30
Temba City Beares 5 Sept 10:30 – 12:30
Mabopane Beares 5 Sept 13:30 – 15:30
Mhube Max City Beares 6 Sept 10:30 – 12:30
Silverton Beares 6 Sept 13:30 – 15:30
Pretoria North Beares 7 Sept 10:30 – 12:30
Quagga Centre Beares 7 Sept 13:30 – 15:30
Gezina Beares 8 Sept 10:30 – 12:30
Arcadia Beares 8 Sept 13:30 – 15:30
Pretoria City Beares 9 Sept 10:30 – 12:30
V/D Walt Street Beares 9 Sept 13:00 – 14:30
Midrand Beares 13 Sept 11:00 – 14:00
Tsakane Beares 14 Sept 11:00 – 13:30
Secunda (Fisthers Square) Beares 15 Sept 10:00 – 13:30
Secunda (Shop 1 Steyn Street) Beares 15 Sept 13:30 – 15:30
Kriel Beares 16 Sept 10:00 – 12:30
Bethal Beares 16 Sept 13:30 – 15:30
Ermelo Beares 19 Sept 10:30 – 12:30
Piet Retief Beares 20 Sept 10:00 – 13:00
Vryheid Beares 22 Sept 13:00 – 15:30
Pongola Beares 23 Sept 13:30 – 16:00
Mtubatuba Beares 26 Sept 13:00 – 15:00
Richards Bay Beares 27 Sept 10:00 – 12:00
Empangeni (Maxwell) Beares 27 Sept 12:30 – 14:00
Empangeni (Plaza) Beares 27 Sept 14:30 – 16:00
Ulundi Beares 28 Sept 11:00 – 13:30
Eshowe Beares 29 Sept 10:30 – 12:00
Sundumbili Beares 29 Sept 13:30 – 15:30
Stanger Beares 30 Sept 10:30 -13:00
Phoenix Beares 30 Sept 14:00 – 16:00
Kwamashu (Bridge City) Beares 3 Oct 10:00 – 12:30
Durban (West Street) Lubners 4 Oct 10:30 – 12:30
Durban (West Street) – FINAL Beares 4 Oct 13:00 – 15:30

Blog 51 – Buddy and Me – Project 3 (22nd – 28th August 2011)

Who Is Steve Heath
A Message To The President of South Africa.
Factors Contributing To The Increase In Child Rape.
A Proposed Solution To Stopping The Rape And Sexual Abuse Of Children in SA.

To watch Buddy and Me in real time click here, select South Africa under “Global Fleet Logins:” in the left hand panel, enter cellphone number 0822549129 and password Buddy.

To make a donation to or information on any of the organisations involved in assisting victims of child rape and abuse, please click on one of the following links:

Beares
Lubners
Bobbi Bear Foundation (KwaZulu-Natal)
The Teddy Bear Clinic (Gauteng)
The TygerBear Foundation (Western Cape)
GRIP (Mpumalanga)
StepThru (Gauteng)

  • To see the ‘Buddy and Me’ scheduled itinerary details for the period 30th August – 4th October 2011 see blog 50
  • To read the shocking details of the Upington horror story – The Hynie Dick Story – regarding the ‘Upington savage pedophile’ see blog 35
  • To read details of the ‘savage’ the police are looking for in connection with the rape of a 3 year little girl, see blog 39
  • To read the heart breaking story by a mother (Cathy Kenney) of the rape of  her 3 year-old daughter see blog 38
  • To read the storey of Natasha who at 10 years-of age was brutally raped and murdered and after serving a very short portion of his sentence, the ‘State’ wants to release the savage who did it, from prison, see blog 10 (November 2010)
  • To read ‘Birds’ story about her incredible courage to face her ‘step-father’ who she looked up to and loved as a ‘father’ who abused her and her love, as told by her mother – Elise – see blog 42

 

So the week started for ‘Buddy and Me’ by first thanking the General Manager of the Protea Winkler Hotel in White River, William Bruntnell for his kind and generous support to the ‘Buddy and Me’ project by providing me with incredible accommodation for the weekend

 William is the cool looking dude with the red jacket on – and then I headed for Nelspruit where ‘Buddy and Me’ visited the Beares store there.

At the Beares store I was introduced to an amazing lady by the name of Prudence Lephoto who runs the ‘SOS Children’s Village’ which is situated a short way outside of Nelspruit and I was taken to see this incredibly amazing initiative.

 

The ‘SOS Children’s Village’ – which is actually a ‘Safe House’ – was officially opened on the 6th October 2006 and consists of 10 houses all built in close proximity with each house being able to house 10 children. At present the ‘Village’ is providing shelter to 85 kids ranging from new born baby’s to 18 year-olds. All the children residing in the ‘Village’ are ‘vulnerable children’ who have been subjected to some sort of abuse or other and I was told that a large number are victims of rape and sexual abuse. Each house has a ‘house mother’ who resides in the house and the kids all partake in the duties to clean the house and to cook, even the guys.

So to Prudence and your wonderful group of ‘House Mothers’, thank you for giving me the privilege and honour of being able to visit your incredible ‘SOS Children’s Village’ and for the amazing work you are doing for the kids, you are all Angels, and to Thabo Vermulen (Beares store manager Nelspruit) and his really friendly staff, thanks very much for arranging for me to meet Prudence and be given the opportunity to visit this truly amazing initiative.

While in Nelspruit I also visited the GRIP offices (Greater Rape Intervention Programme) where I spent some time chatting to the management and staff and obtained a lot of information on what is happening with regard to the rape and sexual abuse of children in the Greater Nelspruit area.

 So meet the incredibly wonderful people of GRIP. The work that this organisation is doing in the Greater Nelspruit region, in my humble opinion, provides victims of child rape as well as victims of domestic violence in general with the best support structure in South Africa. So to the ladies and men who dedicate so much of their personal time to assisting victims of this despicable crime in the Greater Nelspruit area, you have the ‘Buddy and Me – Angels’ award. I have been provided with a document entitled “A Case Study – GRIP” which provides a mound of information on GRIP and so once I have had an opportunity to study it I will be posting a blog on it, so stay tuned to the www.buddyandme.co.za website for more info on this incredible organisation and the essential services they provide for child rape victims and victims of domestic violence.

The other important visit was to the R&R Workshops, where Thabo (Beares manager) arranged with his friend Ralton who owns R&R to weld a break in Buddy’s exhaust system,

 so this is one of Ralton’s competent mechanics, Wayne, undertaking some surgery on Buddy’s exhaust system. So thanks guys Buddy is now once again purring like a Lion!

I checked into the Protea Nelspruit Hotel

and was soon settled in my lovely comfortable accommodation.

 

Obviously while in Nelspruit I met up with the Round Tablers of Nelspruit who have been amazing in providing ‘Buddy and Me’ with an incredible support structure, and after talking at a Round Table function in the evening I was presented with the Round Table banner (In this instance a very large one) by the Chairman of Round Table Nelspruit, Simon Harrison.

My next visit was to the Beares store in Malelane where I once again had a great time chatting to Lucky Shabalala, the Beares store Manager and his friendly staff.

I had a particularly interesting chat with one of the staff members, Sebenzile who told me that the rape and sexual abuse of children in the near-by township of Kamdnada is occurring at an horrendous rate and that it is very seldom reported because the community have lost complete faith in the justice system, as in the police, courts and prison services.

I get involved in many discussions of many diverse subjects during my travels and one ‘discussion’ I got involved in while in Malelane was concerning a news item broadcasted on SABC TV news on Wednesday night (17th August) concerning the fact that our esteemed government claims that they are going to create 5 million jobs, but on the SABC TV ‘Morning Live’ news bulletin on the morning of the 19th it was announced that the SABC (which is a kwazi-government institution) intends retrenching / laying off thousands of employees??? So once again it proves “talk is cheap”.

From Malelane ‘Buddy and Me’ headed further out towards the Swaziland and Mozambique borders to the Beares store in the Nkomazi Plaza. Here I was given the opportunity and privilege of addressing a large group of guests from various walks of life who are all involved in some way or another in providing support to child rape victims.

 This is a small portion of the group, I was actually standing in the middle of them with people seated in the lovely comfortable lounge sweets all around me. So to Rudi Mocke, the Beares store manager thank you for arranging such a magic day for me. Also thanks for arranging the lady from the ‘Daily Sun’, they did a great article and in-fact I was pleasantly surprised when I was driving in Groblersdal on Monday 29th and a newspaper sales chap standing on the corner of an intersection ran up to me waving a copy of the paper saying “You must buy the paper, you are in it” and proceeded to show me a large photo and article in the paper, so many thanks for that.  

So meet Rudi and his merry bunch of lady’s and the one happy chappy, thanks for a great day guys and girls.

The next morning ‘Buddy and Me’ bid farewell to the management and staff of the Protea Nelspruit Hotel

 and drove out of Nelspruit and headed out on the incredibly beautiful and scenic drive through to the wonderful town called Barberton and here the Beares manager Elsabé Van Rooyen did a sterling job in arranging for me to meet some interesting people who provided me with contact details of a number of people in the area who are providing support to victims of child rape as well as victims of all forms of domestic violence, which is apparently happening at a humungous rate in the area.

One of the most amazing bits of information I learnt is the fact that the ‘Department of Social Development’ is under taking campaigns and handing out condoms at the schools to pupils in the area, including those in grades as low as grade 8 (standard 6) who are in the 12 – 13 year-old age group. According to the department, “too many school girls are requiring maternity leave”, mind boggling!!!

I visited the GRIP-VSR (Victim Support Room) at the police station as well as the GRIP-VSR at the Barberton hospital where I was once again totally impressed with the services provided by this organisation and I am convinced that because of GRIP the Greater Nelspruit region has undoubtedly the best support structure for victims of child rape as well as victims of domestic violence, well done ladies and gentlemen you are doing an incredibly wonderful job.

So to Elsabé and her energetic bunch of great people at Beares in Barberton, you have mine and Buddy’s grateful thanks for arranging such a magic day for our visit to Barberton.

After a great night with the Round Tablers of Barberton, the next morning ‘Buddy and Me’ headed for Belfast where I was hosted accommodation on a farm courtesy of friends of the Ermelo Round Table Chairman Stephan Mare, his friends being Stephen and Wilma Hugo and they live on a ‘Hadeco’ ‘bulb flower farm’ which is situated about 5 kilometres outside of Belfast.

 The next morning I visited the Beares store in Belfast and here, apart from the interesting information I obtained from a member of the SAPS-FCS unit (Family and Child, sexual Offences unit); I was provided with devastating information on a recent case of child rape by Loudina Viviers the Beares store manager, the facts of which are mind boggling to put it mildly.

Her niece was 5 years old when it was identified that she had been molested and raped by her step-father. It took the case 5 years to get to court with the child being subjected to immense trauma each time the case was remanded and he was eventually acquitted because the child, who was by then almost 10 years old, could not remember specific details such as the clothes he had been wearing, where certain items of furniture were located in the room and other trivial details. And then ‘they’ want to tell me that the victims are not being let down by the pathetic system???

While in Belfast I also got to visit a ‘shelter’ for orphan kids who are living with grand parents and other family members who cannot afford nursery schools and crèches.

The ‘shelter’ which is named ‘Funda Children’s Safe House’ is owned and run by an amazing man by the name of David Ka-Nkosi and provides shelter for 43 children aged between 1 and 12 years of age. The reason I was particularly impressed with the ‘shelter’ is because in my blog 49 on my website I wrote about the fact that on my extensive travels around townships, I frequently see small children in the 2 – 6 year-old age group wandering around streets, pathways and desolate areas, alone, and commented that “no wonder there are so many small children being abducted and raped” and so David’s ‘safe house’ keeps these vulnerable children off the streets, so well done with what you are doing it is an incredible initiative.

When it came time to bid farewell to the Beares Belfast staff and take a photo,

I could not help having a photograph taken of me with what must be the best looking bear I have seen to date,

 so meet ‘bear’ Jacque Davies.

The weekend was spent in a log cabin on a game farm owned by the Chairman of Round Table Loskop (Groblersdal) Carlo Fourie and his lovely wife Colene (other wise known to Carlo, as Angelica )

 and it was a very busy weekend with me attending social functions at the Round Table club house as well as potjies  

and being invited to attend a ‘Horing Fees’ in support of the ‘Save the Rhino’ campaign

and I got to speak to a lot of people including DJ Miguel Proenca of Jacaranda 94.2 Fm radio – Miguel is the cool dude with the red shirt on my right.

The Tablers of Round Table Loskop RT-233 made a generous contribution to Buddy’s very depleted petrol budget and also arranged for Buddy to have a service done at NTT Toyota Groblersdal, so to the Tablers of Loskop 233 you have mine and Buddy’s heartfelt thanks for your generosity, friendship and incredible hospitality.

Well that about covers the activities of ‘Buddy and Me’ for the week and so all that’s left for me to do is bid you farewell until I do my next blog, so keep well, stay safe and of course KEEP ALL CHILDREN SAFE!!

Caring regards from

‘Buddy (The Beach Buggy)

And

Me’ (Steve Heath)

Please send all your comments and opinions to: steve@buddyandme.co.za

Please note that all comments and opinions on the ‘Buddy and Me’ website and blogs are those of Steve Heath and not those of the sponsors to the ‘Buddy and Me’ project.

Blog 49 – Buddy and Me – Project 3 (15th – 21st August 2011)

Who Is Steve Heath
A Message To The President of South Africa.
Factors Contributing To The Increase In Child Rape.
A Proposed Solution To Stopping The Rape And Sexual Abuse Of Children in SA.

To watch Buddy and Me in real time click here, select South Africa under “Global Fleet Logins:” in the left hand panel, enter cellphone number 0822549129 and password Buddy.

To make a donation to or information on any of the organisations involved in assisting victims of child rape and abuse, please click on one of the following links:

Beares
Lubners
Bobbi Bear Foundation (KwaZulu-Natal)
The Teddy Bear Clinic (Gauteng)
The TygerBear Foundation (Western Cape)
GRIP (Mpumalanga)
StepThru (Gauteng)

  • To see the ‘Buddy and Me’ scheduled itinerary details for the period 21st July – 29th August 2011 see blog 45
  • To read the shocking details of the Upington horror story – The Hynie Dick Story – regarding the ‘Upington savage pedophile’ see blog 35
  • To read details of the ‘savage’ the police are looking for in connection with the rape of a 3 year little girl, see blog 39
  • To read the heart breaking story by a mother (Cathy Kenney) of the rape of  her 3 year-old daughter see blog 38
  • To read the storey of Natasha who at 10 years-of age was brutally raped and murdered and after serving a very short portion of his sentence, the ‘State’ wants to release the savage who did it, from prison, see blog 10 (November 2010)
  • To read ‘Birds’ story about her incredible courage to face her ‘step-father’ who she looked up to and loved as a ‘father’ who abused her and her love, as told by her mother – Elise – see blog 42

 

Hi to all ye ‘Buddy and Me’ supporters. So another week has been completed in the lives of ‘Buddy and Me’. I must tell you that the week ended with a devastating ‘accident’ for me which resulted in my not being able to get my website blog done on time, but I will explain in more detail what happened at the end of this blog.

So the week started with ‘Buddy and Me’ leaving Jo’burg on Tuesday morning in freezing cold weather. Fortunately my ‘guardian Angel’ was once again shinning down on ‘Buddy and Me’ and the rain and snow which was predicted in all weather forecasts did not materialise, but it was freezing cold never the less.

And it got colder as I travelled towards Burgersfort and Steelpoort and I battled to get out of Buddy to fill up in Stoffberg.

I was kindly hosted accommodation in Steelpoort, which is about 20 kilometres away from where I was going to visit the Burgersfort Beares store on Wednesday morning, by the mother and father of a friend of mine (Ryan Robins who is the President of the Derelicts Motor Cycle Club in Germiston) Lenske and Thorn (Bugs) Buglass.

So meet Lenske and Cadac sniffing out the trailers wheels.

Wednesday morning Lenske, who is a facilitator for the local schools, asked to be able to join me on my visit to the Beares store in Burgersfort as well as visits to the local hospital, police and an NGO in one of the local townships. Unfortunately MacDonald Mathethwa, the Beares store manager’s attempts at getting the local SAPS-FCS units head to attend a discussion with me failed, as she had done on my previous visit to the area in September 2009. After a very informative chat with MacDonald and his staff, Lenske and I bid the Beares staff farewell,

and as I will not take no for an answer we headed for the police station where I was determined to speak to someone to find out what is happening with the rape of children in the area and to establish what, if any, support structure is in place in the area to encourage mothers and children to report the crime of child rape.

After a bit of a shunt around, Lenske and I eventually ended up in the Station Commanders office and after explaining who I was and what I am doing and what I hope to achieve and how, he called for a lady investigating officer from the FCS unit, a constable ‘Veronica’ who proved to be very enlightening on what is happening in the area and went into great detail of what she believes is contributing to the ever increasing number of child rape cases taking place in the area, and I must say that this is one very dedicated policewoman who believes that my proposal for a solution to stopping the rape and sexual abuse of children “is right on the button”. I also established that there is no support structure of any kind in the area focusing on providing support to victims of child rape.

From many discussions with members of the South African Police Service it is very clear that even they believe that it’s not in the police’s or the governments best interests to implement support structures and systems to encourage mothers and children to report the rape and sexual abuse of children simply for the reason that if all cases were reported the statistics would reveal a shocking situation which would create a very emabarrassing situation for them. I have been told categorically by many members of the police service, and this includes senior offices, that if their statistics reveals large numbers of child rape cases being reported, this makes them “look bad” and they are rapped over the knuckles and hence in many areas police officers are discouraging mothers and children from reporting cases of child rape.

I have asked the question “Why are people, as in mothers and other family members, who are fully aware of the fact that a child is being raped and sexually abused, by family members, not being prosecuted to the full extent of the law under section 54 of the ‘Sexual Offences Act 32.2007’ (the section pertaining to the compulsory reporting of cases of the rape and sexual abuse of children) and the response is always “If the father is jailed for the rape of his daughter/step-daughter AND the mother is charged and jailed under section 54, who is going to feed the family (after-all we in South Africa do not possess a ‘Welfare Department’, well we do – but in name only – all they do is spend hundreds of millions of Rands buying votes for the government in the form of millions of grants)”.

 My response to this is: “Hypothetically, if I and my wife (hypothetically speaking because I do not have oneJ) went to a party in separate vehicles and after enjoying the pleasures of the party drove home and were both stopped in a road block and it was established that we were both under the influence of alcohol, would the police official at the road block say ‘Oh dear we cannot arrest you both because you are husband and wife and if I arrested and detained you both who will look after your children’ – I don’t think so!!!” So why is the law not being applied in respect of section 54?

From Burgersfort ‘Buddy and Me’ headed for Lydenburg where we witnessed the destruction caused by rioting, this is not in my book classified as ‘striking’, municipal workers. I have witnessed the blatant destruction of many towns in the form of municipal workers emptying garbage bins and garbage bags into the streets with an incredible amount of filth as well as damage to traffic lights and other property in a number of towns I have visited.

My visit to the Lydenburg Beares store resulted in my having one of the best and most in-depth press interviews I have ever had. This was with a lady journalist by the name of Narda Vermaak who is with the ‘Lowveld Media’ group and she promised to do an ‘exposé’ article on the project and to have it published in not only the ‘Lowvelder’ newspaper, which is circulated to the entire Mpumalanga region, but to have it published in 16 other publications affiliated with the ‘Lowveld Media’ group. So to Mike Matlou, the Beares store manager in Lydenberg, many thanks for arranging that,

so meet the great guys and gals of Beares Lydenburg.

To anyone reading the ‘Buddy and Me’ blogs, if you have any contacts within the media, in the form of TV (SABC – Mnet etc) or national newspapers, magazines etc please assist the project by mentioning the ‘Buddy and Me’ project to them so that we can get as much exposure to the fight against child rape as we possibly can, we need government to sit up and take responsibility for what they are NOT doing to eradicate this scourge of child rape from our society. I have constantly been sending emails to SABC (TV2 ‘Morning Live’ as well as ‘3 Talk with Noleen’ and Carte Blanche) but have had no success in attracting their attention as yet.

After passing over the ‘Longtom Pass’

(This is ‘Longtom’ the cannon placed on top of the mountain during the ‘Boer’ war in 1901), and witnessed the spectacular view of the lovely town of Sabie way-off down in the valley

 ‘Buddy and Me’ descended into, first, the town which I rate as the cleanest and most beautiful town in South Africa, Sabie, and then on to Hazyview  which was once in the same category as Sabie but unfortunately has deteriorated into the same state of destruction so many lovely farming and country towns to be found scattered around South Africa have found themselves in.  

On arriving in Hazyview I immediately headed for the Protea Hotel where I was kindly provided with incredible accommodation for the night and immediately on getting settled into my room I headed for the hotels bar and veranda where I was served a lovely cold ‘Miller MGD’ by a very friendly barman named Amon

 and relaxed and enjoyed the spectacular view.

The next morning I visited the Beares store in Hazyview. This is yet another Beares store where whenever I visit, the management and staff make me feel like I am a long lost relative and the store manager, Peter Makhubela and his staff continued the tradition on this visit, so meet the amazingly friendly staff of

 Beares Hazyview.

 From Hazyview ‘Buddy and Me’ headed for White River where I was once again kindly hosted accommodation by the Protea Hotel group and this time it was in the lovely ‘‘The Winkler Protea Hotel’ and as so often happens, the front office staff welcomed me to the hotel in Royal style.

One of the reasons I always make White River a stop-over place on the project is because some very good friends of mine, Cheryl and Horst Reum reside in White River and if I ever visit anywhere close to the town and don’t pop in for a visit they will hunt me down and I will be subjected to some gruelling punishment.

The other reason I always make White River a stop-over place, is because Horst is a genius VW mechanic and owns a workshop in White River and he always works wonders with Buddy, and on this visit it was no exception because Buddy’s brake lights were not working.

So Buddy was admitted into ‘theatre’ and prepared for ‘surgery’ and Horst discovered that the switch on the brake pedal was broken, and so after fitting a new one and getting the lights working once again he greased the front suspension and buddy was ‘A-for-away’ again.

Here Horst doing a bit of ‘surgery’ on Buddy’s front suspension.

 While in White River over the weekend, Cheryl – who by the way owns the very successful property sales group ‘Fine & Country’ International Realty’ – so if you are looking for property in the White River area you need to contact her on 013 – 751 3245 – invited me to accompany her to a large church lunch function on Saturday afternoon where I was given the opportunity to spread the word and preach the gospel according to ‘Buddy and Me’ to the church congregation and to chat to a large number of people about the project

 

On Sunday morning Horst and Cheryl decided that I needed a good break and so took me on an excursion of the Kruger National Park.

So it’s time to meet these two incredibly wonderful people, Cheryl and Horst Reum. We were lucky enough to see four of the big 5 animals, the only one we didn’t see was the leopard and I got to see quite a few of my all time favourite animal

 ‘Jumbo’. In the Pretoriuskop camp it was amazing to see herds of ‘buck’ walking amongst the cars and chalets not perturbed in anyway.

 and of course there was ‘this other animal’ wandering around the camp 

and of course I could not, not have a pic of me with that amazing lady Cheryl ReumJ On the way to the gate this shy little guy was checking us out from the road side

 and this ‘not so shy’,

 obviously, male, was enjoying the pleasures of having a ‘wife’. As we neared the exit gate

 this ‘security guard’ ‘sentry’ watched over us and bid us farewell from high up on his ‘’sentry box/rock’

In order to reach the Kruger National Park from White River, one has to pass through a few very large townships/informal settlement areas and I could not help but shake my head in wonderment as I so often do when passing through townships and settlement areas and seeing so many small children, aged between 3 and 6 years-of-age, wondering around the streets and foot paths on their own. And then we wonder why so many kids/small children are being abducted, raped and sexually abused, come on guys and gals – parents – shake your heads, your brains are stuck!!!

Now for the story about the devastating ‘accident’ I experienced on Sunday night. After the long hot day in the Kruger Park, Cheryl and Horst dropped me off at my hotel where I decided to have a nice relaxing bath. I was expecting a phone call from the Round Tablers of Nelspruit and so took my BlackBerry cell phone into the bath room and placed it on my towel which was on the shelf at the end of the bath. I covered the cell phone with the corner of the towel to stop moisture getting into it – what a joke!! I climbed out of the bath and pulled the towel and saw my BlackBerry take a dive into the bath!!!!

I hurriedly removed the battery and used the hotels hair dryer to try and dry it out, but after all attempts to dry it and after putting the battery and sim card back in, the phone was dead!!  The big disaster part was that all my photos for the past week were on the phone and they were gone!!! L I left the battery and sim card out of the phone throughout the evening and in the morning when I put it back together the phone was still dead!! L I decided to try something and plugged in the charger, made a cup of coffee and had a shower the whole time cursing myself for being such an idiot and finally dressed and started packing. While packing I saw a flash of red light out of the corner of my eye and on checking the phone discovered that the screen showed that it was reprogramming itself. A couple of minutes later the phone was fully operationalJ So I got all my photos back and my BlackBerry is operating once again, so ‘Buddy and Me’ are fully functional again Yaahoo!!! Thanks to the brilliant and safe technology of BlackBerry, oh boy I love my Blackberry

Well that now finishes my story for the week and happy that I could finally get my website blog done, so all that’s left is for me to wish you all a great week ahead, I hope you all keep well and stay safe and above all KEEP ALL CHILDREN SAFE!!

Caring regards from

Buddy (The Beach Buggy)

And

Me’ (Steve Heath)

Please send your comments and opinions to: steve@buddyandme.co.za

Please note that all comments and opinions on the ‘Buddy and Me’ website and blogs are those of Steve Heath and not those of the sponsors to the ‘Buddy and Me’ project.

Blog 48 – Buddy and Me – Project 3 (1st – 14th August 2011)

Who Is Steve Heath
A Message To The President of South Africa.
Factors Contributing To The Increase In Child Rape.
A Proposed Solution To Stopping The Rape And Sexual Abuse Of Children in SA.

To watch Buddy and Me in real time click here, select South Africa under “Global Fleet Logins:” in the left hand panel, enter cellphone number 0822549129 and password Buddy.

To make a donation to or information on any of the organisations involved in assisting victims of child rape and abuse, please click on one of the following links:

Beares
Lubners
Bobbi Bear Foundation (KwaZulu-Natal)
The Teddy Bear Clinic (Gauteng)
The TygerBear Foundation (Western Cape)
GRIP (Mpumalanga)
StepThru (Gauteng)

Well it seems like, and in fact is, ages since I last posted a blog, and so I thought I better sit down and do one to update what has been happening in the lives of ‘Buddy and Me’.

So after a fantastic weekend at the ‘SATVIK Back-packers’ situated a short way out side of Tzaneen on the banks of the Tzaneen Dam, (for details see blog 47) Monday morning ‘Buddy and Me’ headed into Tzaneen where we met up with a large group of kids from a local school as well as guests in the form of members of the local police constabulary, social workers and members of the local press,

 and obviously the staff of the Beares store in Tzaneen.

One of the many conversations/discussions I had during my visit to Tzaneen, and in fact I can confidently say that this particular discussion which has been raised many times during the ‘Buddy and Me’ project has proved to be undoubtedly the biggest controversial subject discussed, and that is the issue of ‘fund raising’ by so many organisations to be found scattered around South Africa, for the purpose of supporting abandoned, neglected, and abused children, as well as for the support of babies and children who are born HIV positive due to pregnancy.

Based on my discussions with South Africans right across our country, it is painfully obvious that the public and corporate’s of South Africa are tired of continuously being approached by people and organisations to contribute towards the support of children who are being abandoned, neglected and born by mothers who in-spite of being fully aware of their HIV/AIDS status and aware of the consequences of falling pregnant, bring children into the world.

Virtually every day, in discussions, I hear members of the public, as well as ‘government officials’ in the form of social workers and policemen and women, saying “the government is far too ‘soft’ on people (parents) who continuously bring children into the world knowing that they cannot afford to support them, and after enjoying the pleasures of making the babies expect everyone else to pay to raise them”.

The government is spending hundreds of millions of Rands every month in ‘child grants’ knowing that only a very small portion of these grants is being used by the parents for the benefit of the child, in the majority of cases the ‘child grant’ is being used for the purchase of TV’s and other pleasures and luxuries of life by the parents, particularly in the cases of single mothers and in particular HIV/AIDS positive women who get the additional grants for their HIV positive children. (For details on the information I was provided with while in Howick on this subject see blog 9)

The general consensus is that in instances where children are found to be abused, neglected and abandoned and are placed in ‘institutions’ such as the one I wrote about in blog 43 and which is situated in Mafikeng, the parents must be held responsible and accountable and be placed in ‘work farms – factories/prisons’ and be forced to produce food and clothing for the children.

Discussions with people across the length and breadth of South Africa, and this includes those of all races and from many different walks of life, have revealed that they are tired of seeing films and pictures of starving and abandoned children, not only in South Africa, but throughout AFRICA as a whole, and everyone is expected to just keep coughing up to support these starving babies and children while men and women keep enjoying the pleasures of making them and are not being held accountable and responsible for subjecting the kids to the devastating pain and suffering we are seeing on a daily basis.

“WE HAVE TO CURE THE PROBLEM AND NOT JUST KEEP SUPPORTING IT BY FUNDING IT – AND THE SAME GOES FOR THE RAPE AND SEXUAL ABUSE OF CHILDREN”

I also visited the Beares store in Maake,

which is about 20 kilometres outside of Tzaneen and in order to reach this place I had to travel through a large a township area where I managed to speak to a number of the local residents, in particular women, who confirmed that ‘Hooow the raping of children and young girls in this area is veeeery bad” and it was also confirmed that “There is no use in reporting it to the police, because nothing happens”.

From Tzaneen ‘Buddy and Me’ headed for Phalaborwa where I was kindly hosted accommodation by the Round Table Chairman of Phalaborwa Pieter Van der Merwe and his lovely wife Deidre.

 and I spent a magic evening braaing and chatting to the Round Tablers of Phalaborwa and their wives.

Then it was time for a visit to the Beares store in Phalaborwa

 where I had an interesting chat with a lady from the local press as well as with a few other guests from the local community. I established that the police station has a well equipped ‘Victim Support Room’ and is generally kept quite busy, mainly by victims of rape, as in young girls in the 14 – 18 year-old age category which invariably results in the case being closed due to the ‘rapists’ paying the young girl and her parents money.

So what happened to the legislation in the form of the ‘Sexual Offences Act 32/2007’ which clearly defines the fact that sex with a girl in this age category constitutes ‘RAPE’? I must admit that in-spite of having read the Act a number of times; I have failed to locate the section which states that “Should the rapist pay an agreed upon sum of money to the victim and or her parents, the case of rape (statutory rape) will be dropped”??

From Phalaborwa ‘Buddy and Me’ headed for Hoedspruit and immediately on arriving in the area headed for the Klaserie Dam where I set up camp.

This resort must be one of the loveliest and most tranquil resorts one can wish to camp in. It is surrounded by large game farms and in the morning I was woken by the sound of what appeared to be three very large lions roaring and grunting close by. I am told that the sound of a lion roaring, grunting, travels for kilometres, but these sounded pretty close, I also heard hyena and this is a particularly weird sound.

My visit to the Beares store in Hoedspruit

 resulted in a very lengthy interview with the editor of the local newspaper ‘Kruger/Canyon’ and which identified the fact that the local police are rated as being amongst the most corrupt police officials in South Africa, mmm I must admit that’s not exactly what I would like my town to be renown for?

It was also confirmed that child rape is occurring on a large scale in the area, along with the rape of women as well as domestic violence on a very large scale and that there is a “pretty good and effective ‘Victim Support Group’” which is comprised of a group of local residents who have joined together to assist victims of rape and domestic violence. Once again there is no sign of any form of assistance from government in this regard and if the residents do not provide this service and fund it, the victims would just have to suffer in silence, as they do in the majority of areas around South Africa.

I was told that the police station has a ‘Victim Support Room’ but as was in the case of Thabazimbi, as well as a few other police stations I visited, when I arrived at the police station and asked to see the

Victim Support Room’ and to meet the person who is in charged of it, I was told “Sorry the room is locked and the person who is responsible for it (Jamela) is not here, I don’t know when she will be back and we can’t contact her”. I rest my case!!

Because of the postponement of the ‘Child Abuse Symposium’ which was to be held in Cape Town on the 11th and 12th of August by ‘The TygerBear Clinic’ and at which I was going to be a guest speaker, I was forced to take a break for the past week and so headed to Jo’burg to sort out a few personal things which amongst others was to get a new batch of flyers printed, and by the way – if there is anyone out there who wants to contribute to the ‘Buddy and Me’ project in the form of sponsoring the printing of the flyers your assistance will be greatly appreciated.

I spent the weekend with friends Jaco Labuschagene and Celeste Grobler

 and on Tuesday morning headed for Villiers on the banks of the Vaal River with Wonder Woman – June Porter – where we proceeded to enjoy a relaxing few days camping

and fishing, and just to prove it!

In-spite of the fact that I’m wearing a ‘Springbok’ rugby jersey, the arms spread in celebration was for the successful catch and successful release of a fish, not the continued dismal performance of our national rugby team.

 

On the drive back to Jo’burg on Sunday, we stopped off at the ‘Total Petro-port’ filling station halfway between Heidelberg and Jo’burg to fill up both Buddy’s forever empty stomach (petrol tank) as well as our own. On entering the restaurant and waiting for our food and drinks order, a gentleman seated at the table adjacent to ours commented that he could not fail to notice Buddy in the car park and enquired about the project. After an interesting chat, he asked for the ‘Buddy and Me’ website details and so I provided him with a project flyer/brochure and he bid us farewell. On requesting our bill for our food and drinks we were told by the waitress that the gentleman we had been talking to had already paid our bill.

I have often mentioned that I am blessed to meet so many incredibly amazing people on this project, and this is a classic example of what I mean. I unfortunately only know the gentleman as ‘Ian’, so I sincerely hope that Ian reads my blogs and accepts mine and June’s sincere thanks and appreciation for your wonderfully kind gesture.

Another interesting comment which was made recently in a discussion, is concerning the fact that “extensive coverage is given to Julius Malema by all forms of the media in South Africa every time he opens his mouth and sprouts the garbage that usually comes out of it, yet in-spite of continuously having forwarded the details of the ‘Buddy and Me’ project to the SABC and other TV channels, none of them have bothered to contact me in order to expose the information revealed by the research I have undertaken on the subject of child rape, and it would appear that they are just as unconcerned about the shocking situation as our government is”.

So if there is anyone out there who is in a position to whisper in the ear of someone connected with the media, in the form of radio or TV or national press, please pass on my contact details to them, it will be sincerely appreciated.

Well that about covers all, or rather a portion, of the travels and discussions ‘Buddy and Me’ were involved in over the past 2 weeks, and so on Tuesday morning ‘Buddy and Me’ will be heading back to the Mpumalanga region and will be continuing our “Buddy and Me’ crusade to ensure that our government does everything necessary to eradicate the scourge of the rape and sexual abuse of children from our society.

So I will bid you farewell for now, keep well and stay safe, and lets pray that our government wakes up and does what is necessary to protect our country’s greatest asset “Our children” and ensures that they are all kept safe.

Caring regards from

Buddy (The Beach Buggy)

And

Me’ (Steve Heath)

Please send your comments and opinions to: steve@buddyandme.co.za

Please note that all comments and opinions on the ‘Buddy and Me’ website and blogs are those of Steve Heath and not those of the sponsors to the ‘Buddy and Me’ project.

 

Blog 47 – Buddy and Me – (25th – 31st July 2011)

Who Is Steve Heath
A Message To The President of South Africa.
Factors Contributing To The Increase In Child Rape.
A Proposed Solution To Stopping The Rape And Sexual Abuse Of Children in SA.

To watch Buddy and Me in real time click here, select South Africa under “Global Fleet Logins:” in the left hand panel, enter cellphone number 0822549129 and password Buddy.

To make a donation to or information on any of the organisations involved in assisting victims of child rape and abuse, please click on one of the following links:

Beares
Lubners
Bobbi Bear Foundation (KwaZulu-Natal)
The Teddy Bear Clinic (Gauteng)
The TygerBear Foundation (Western Cape)
GRIP (Mpumalanga)
StepThru (Gauteng)

  • To see the ‘Buddy and Me’ scheduled itinerary details for the period 21st July – 29th August 2011 see blog 45
  • To read the shocking details of the Upington horror story – The Hynie Dick Story – regarding the ‘Upington savage pedophile’ see blog 35
  • To read details of the ‘savage’ the police are looking for in connection with the rape of a 3 year little girl, see blog 39
  • To read the heart breaking story by a mother (Cathy Kenney) of the rape of  her 3 year-old daughter see blog 38
  • To read the storey of Natasha who at 10 years-of age was brutally raped and murdered and after serving a very short portion of his sentence, the ‘State’ wants to release the savage who did it, from prison, see blog 10 (November 2010)
  • To read ‘Birds’ story about her incredible courage to face her ‘step-father’ who she looked up to and loved as a ‘father’ who abused her and her love, as told by her mother – Elise – see blog 42

 

So another week is in the past and it proved to be quite an informative one as well as great in terms of the amazing people I met and places ‘Buddy and Me’ visited.

The week started with a visit to the Beares store in Mokopane (otherwise known to many who are not aware of the fact that the towns name has changed its name from Potgietersrus) where I met the newly appointed Beares store Manager Hendrik Nepgen and his friendly staff.

I had met a lot of people in Mokopane over the weekend who provided me with an amazing amount of information regarding the child rape situation in the area, and so after a relaxing time with the Beares staff and getting the opportunity to catch up with responses to a pile of emails, I left Mokopane and headed for Polokwane.

In my last blog (Blog – 46) I mentioned that I was going to provide details of the effect the HIV/AIDS epidemic has had on the rape of children, and so in response to an article that was written by a gentleman by the name of David Beresford from the Nelspruit area who wrote an article regarding the excuse used by so many individuals when raping children which is that the Sangoma’s are claiming that “if you have sex with a virgin child it will cure your HIV/AIDS”, so here is the information on this subject which I have learned during the passed 6 years of research on the subject of child rape and specifically this aspect of it.

Prior to the ‘Sexual Offences Act – Act 32/2007’ coming into effect, it was deemed ‘unlawful’ to obtain or ascertain a rapists HIV/AIDS status. However through ‘other’ means, such as when an in-mate fell sick etc it was necessary for the doctors to obtain blood samples and to undertake various tests to ascertain what illness the inmate was suffering with and these tests I am told included HIV/AIDS tests. These tests indicated that the far majority of child rapists are in-fact HIV/AIDS negative.

With the implementation of the ‘Sexual Offences Act – Act32/2007’ three years ago, which makes it compulsory for the testing of a suspected rapists, tests are carried out at the time of being charged in order to establish the rapists HIV/AIDS status. Information provided through this means over the past three years has, according to the information provided to me, further confirmed that the majority of child rapists are HIV/AIDS negative.

 

Further research has however confirmed that although the HIV/AIDS epidemic has not impacted on the rape of children for the reasons claimed, as in to cure HIV/AIDS, it has played a major role for other reasons.

It is a common fact and knowledge that if a child is born HIV positive due to pregnancy in the rural/township areas, these being where the majority of child rape cases are taking place, due to poverty and the low standard of living the child is not expected to live past its 4 – 5th birthday. It is also common fact and knowledge that children in these areas are sexually active from the age of 12 years of age. Based on these facts the children in the age groups of 6 – 10 years of age are therefore in a ‘safe zone’ as far as being HIV/AIDS negative is concerned.

All my research has indicated that child rape being perpetrated by ‘strangers’ is occurring with children in this age category for the reason that they ‘don’t want to be infected with HIV/AIDS’ and convicted rapists I have had the misfortune to have met and interviewed, have confirmed this, saying that if they had sex/raped an older woman the possibilities of contracting HIV/AIDS is good. However due to the fact that 90% of child rape is being perpetrated by biological fathers, step-fathers, uncles and grandfathers, these individuals are fully aware of the child’s HIV/AIDS status and so they are raping children of all ages.

                                    ———————————-

 

From Mokopane ‘Buddy and Me’ headed for the bustling city of Polokwane, where I was kindly provided accommodation in the lovely Protea Landmark Hotel which is situated about five kilometres outside of Polokwane in the tranquil countryside.

 So meet the Hotels General Manager Louise Veldman and her front office staff.

The next morning ‘Buddy and Me’ headed into Polokwane where we met up with the friendly staff of the Beares store.

 Here the branch Manager Pieter Du Preez (right at the back in the photo with the ‘white hair’) arranged for me to meet with, apart from many others, a really interesting lady by the name of Peggy Legodi who is a councillor with ward 11 and is a member of the ‘ANC Woman’s league’ and in addition to this is the owner of a crèche AND is the local ‘Community Liaison Officer’, all in all a very busy lady! In addition to this amazing lady I got to chat to an amazing lady by the name of Betty Kgare, who is the Secretary of the “ANC Woman’s League’ AND can you believe it! Councillor Mehlape! All the ‘Larne’s” in one day!! Amazing!!

After being presented with the details of what I believe is a solution to eradicating child rape from our society, it was unanimously agreed that our government has to pay attention to my proposal and to commit themselves to implementing it and so eradicate the sick crime of child rape from our society completely. In-fact Peggy Legodi confirmed my belief that we have to stop focusing on the problem, as in expecting the public and corporate companies of South Africa to keep footing the bill for providing support to the victims and to focus on implementing a solution, we cannot afford to continue doing ‘damage control’ forever!!

From Polokwane ‘Buddy and Me’ headed for Makhado (or Louis Trichardt as some people still know it) and along the way ‘Buddy and Me’ crossed the ‘Tropic of Capricorn’.

 (Don’t worry about the spelling on the board, but it is definitely the ‘Tropic of CapricoRn)

 In Louis Trichardt “Buddy and Me’ were once again hosted accommodation by the Round Tablers and this time, as was the case with my last visit to Louis Trichardt, I was home hosted by that king of crazy guys Jerry Cloete and his lovely wife Karien and their two daughters Chané and latest addition Taelyn. The evening was spent with a large group of Tablers and their wives and better halves over a lovely sea food supper and I got to meet the President of the Round Table for Southern Africa, Johan Lindeque who travelled all the way from Port Elizabeth,  

 and presented me with his personal banner and lapel pin, and can you believe it I was given the honour of meeting another President, Sonel Prinsloo who is the President of the ‘Lady’s Circle’ of Southern Africa – 2 Presidents in one night, amazing stuff!

Sonel is the stunning blond lady standing on my right hand side.

I had a wonderful time with the Beares staff in Polokwane,

 and got to meet some really interesting people and had a very in-depth chat with a group of kids from a local high school who provided me with some interesting opinions on ‘what needs to be done to eradicate child rape from our society’ and was provided with probably some of the best opinions I have heard for some time. I also got to meet an amazing man by the name of Councillor (COPE) Geoffrey Tshibuimo who agreed entirely with my proposal in principal and has promised to read it in depth and to email me with his final opinion and comments.

 The kids of course insisted that Buddy be included into the days activities.  

So meet the friendly Beares staff of Louis Trichardt and the smooth looking dude on the left of the photo is Councillor Geoffrey Tshibuimo.

 After bidding farewell to first Karien, Chané and Taelyn,

 and then dad, character of note Jerry

it was off to the ‘Far North” and you know when you have reached the extreme north when you see this:

 “The big daddy- grandfather – Baobab tree!” and so ‘Buddy and Me’ had arrived in Musina, the furthest point in South Africa, actually I’m sorry I am wrong, this is the furthest point in South African –

 Beit Bridge! I could not believe that ‘Buddy and Me’ had left Cape Town – Agulhas, the most Southern point of Africa and have taken three months to travel to the most Northern point of South Africa and have spoken to and interviewed literally hundreds of people on our way!

 My accommodation in Musina was arranged by the Round Tablers of Louis Trichardt and so I was hosted in the lovely Matoppi B&B by Phillip and Alda Rossouw.

 If you ever find yourself in Musina you have to stay at this truly tranquil and lovely place. Contact details are: Tel: 015-5342669 Email: info@matoppi.com Website: www.placesforafrica.com/matoppi  The address is 45 Kerk Street Musina.

So after a magic day with Anna Mulando, the Beares store Manager in Musina and her really friendly staff in Musina Beares store,

 I paid a visit to the Thuthuzela Care Centre which was ‘established’ in the Musina district hospital 2 months ago, and so is still not functioning properly, and my experience on visiting 28 Thuthuzela Care Centres to date tells me that it will remain as it is for years to come, unless the government takes the time to read my proposal and commits to them being set up properly.

I also had a lengthy chat with members of the local police who confirmed that child rape, because of the huge problem the area is facing resulting from a large community of ‘illegal’ immigrants from Zimbabwe, is happening on a frightening scale. The thing that amuses me is that the police are fully aware of the large contingent of illegal immigrants but what are they doing about it. When I asked my police guests, my question received the response of, a shrug of the shoulders and “there isn’t much we can do about it because they just keep coming back”. It sounds pretty much like our governments attitude towards the rape of children!!

It was also confirmed that all that has occurred by the military being placed along the border to supposedly stop illegal immigrants crossing into South Africa, is that their ‘income’ has been boosted immensely!

I also had a great interview with the local radio station “Musina Community Radio 104.0 Mhz with DJ – Biscuit and the news editor Kabelo Thelele.

Kablelo confirmed that one of the biggest problems facing the area is the fact that the “Guma Guma”, these being Zimbabweans who ‘assist’ fellow Zimbabweans with plans and routes to cross into South Africa illegally, who after receiving payment and on arriving at the place on the border where they are to cross into South Africa, the illegal immigrants are robbed and raped. Kabelo told me that the banks of the river are littered with the underwear of woman and children and even men who have been stripped, raped and robbed and then chased across the river into South Africa.

From Musina, on Friday I travelled back to Louis Trichardt where I collected my trailer from Jerry and then continued through to Tzaneen where the Tzaneen Round Tablers kindly arranged for me to stay at an absolutely amazing place called ‘SATVIK’ which is a Backpackers/self-catering set up on the banks of the Tzaneen Dam.

 Saturday was yet another black day for South Africa rugby supporters with the Boks being annihilated by the All Blacks but I had a great morning in-spite of this with the Round Tablers of Tzaneen.

 So thanks guys, your support to the ‘Buddy and Me’ project as well as your great friendship and hospitality is sincerely appreciated.

But the Tablers friendship and hospitality did not end there, on Sunday they all arrived at ‘SATVIK’ where we enjoyed a magic day in the warm sunshine, while most of the rest of South Africans were freezing their butts off, we braaied and consumed large quantities of beer, oh and ‘tried’ to catch fish right!!

 I was also presented with the Tzaneen Round Tables banner and lapel pin by the Tables Chairman Bruce Mogg while Vice Chairman Dale Eberhard watched on.

I have often said that I try very hard not to get too acquainted with animals on this project, especially dogs, because when it comes time for me to leave I can say good bye to people much easier than I can say good bye to an animal, and in the case of ‘SATVIK’ I made an incredible friend in the form of a cat. Now people who know me well, are fully aware of the fact that I am not really a ‘cat’ person, but this cat absolutely stole my heart and followed me around all weekend and slept on my bed, cuddling up in my arms.

 And when it came time for me to go to town, my new found friend always jumped into Buddy’s passenger seat and I had a battle to get her out and drive off without her running behind, I have never experienced this with a cat in my life before! 

 

While doing my week-ends shopping in Tzaneen, I saw a sticker which I had to get and so Buddy now has a new sticker added to his ever increasing collection, I’m sure the lady’s will enjoy this one.

 I certainly did especially when considering the atrocities being committed against woman and children by so called “men”!!

 So all that was left for me to do was to thank Louis Jordaan, the owner of ‘SATVIKBackpackers, for his kind and generous support to the ‘Buddy and Me’ project by providing me with accommodation for the weekend.

So meet Louis Jordaan, with my ‘other Buddy’ “Kitty”. So if you ever need to escape to a really tranquil and peaceful place, ‘SATVIK’ is the place to visit and stay. Details of the place are in the ‘Coast to Coast – Backpackers booklet’ but you can get hold of Louis on telephone number: 015 – 307 3920 or cell: 084 556 2414 or email: satvik@pixie.co.za I promise you, you will not be sorry.

So that ended the week for ‘Buddy and Me’. Next week will start in Tzaneen and finish in Hoedspruit and because the world symposium on child rape in Cape Town has been postponed to October, at which I was supposed to be a guest speaker, I have been left with an open week, and because I don’t want to have to reschedule all the Beares stores and other appointments already established for me I will have to be faced with a whole week off, so until we meet up again on my website blog, ‘Buddy and Me’ wish you all a safe and productive week. Keep well. Stay safe and please keep all children safe.

Caring regards from

Buddy (The Beach Buggy)

And

Me’ (Steve Heath)

Please send your comments and opinions to: steve@buddyandme.co.za

Please note that all comments and opinions on the ‘Buddy and Me’ website and blogs are those of Steve Heath and not those of the sponsors to the ‘Buddy and Me’ project.  

Blog 46 – Buddy and Me – Project 3 (18th – 24th July 2011)

Who Is Steve Heath
A Message To The President of South Africa.
Factors Contributing To The Increase In Child Rape.
A Proposed Solution To Stopping The Rape And Sexual Abuse Of Children in SA.

To watch Buddy and Me in real time click here, select South Africa under “Global Fleet Logins:” in the left hand panel, enter cellphone number 0822549129 and password Buddy.

To make a donation to or information on any of the organisations involved in assisting victims of child rape and abuse, please click on one of the following links:

Beares
Lubners
Bobbi Bear Foundation (KwaZulu-Natal)
The Teddy Bear Clinic (Gauteng)
The TygerBear Foundation (Western Cape)
GRIP (Mpumalanga)
StepThru (Gauteng)

  • To see the ‘Buddy and Me’ scheduled itinerary details for the period 21st July – 29th August 2011 see blog 45
  • To read the shocking details of the Upington horror story – The Hynie Dick Story – regarding the ‘Upington savage pedophile’ see blog 35
  • To read details of the ‘savage’ the police are looking for in connection with the rape of a 3 year little girl, see blog 39
  • To read the heart breaking story by a mother (Cathy Kenney) of the rape of  her 3 year-old daughter see blog 38
  • To read the storey of Natasha who at 10 years-of age was brutally raped and murdered and after serving a very short portion of his sentence, the ‘State’ wants to release the savage who did it, from prison, see blog 10 (November 2010)
  • To read ‘Birds’ story about her incredible courage to face her ‘step-father’ who she looked up to and loved as a ‘father’ who abused her and her love, as told by her mother – Elise – see blog 42

 

So the ‘Buddy and Me’ week started off by first thanking Chrislen le Roux the Protea Hotel Manager for her kind and generous support to the ‘Buddy and Me’ project, and then I started my hunt for petrol which involved stopping at 3 filling stations and eventually found one that appeared to have petrol but had about 20 cars standing waiting to be filled up, so I only left the Sandton area at 8:45am. Then I drove through to Mafikeng via Krugersdorp, Ventersdorp and Lichtenburg to Mafikeng (360 kilometres) and after collecting the trailer at the Beares store headed out on the road to Zeerust.

The drive to Zeerust involved driving along a stretch of road which I can only describe as being the biggest rip off, in fact it’s pure theft on the part of our government and so called ‘Roads Department – Department of Transport’ which involves a ‘toll gate’ which is a few kilometres before Swartruggens which costs R65-00. Now if this was a lovely double lane highway it ‘might’ be acceptable, but this stretch of road is a shockingly patched piece of road and is in fact a single lane which requires motorists using this ‘road’ and who are being ripped off by the extravagant costs of this piece of ‘road’ to sit behind trucks for long stretches of road because of the twists and bends in the road. So I take it you are aware of the fact that I am pissed off with our ‘Transport/Roads Department’! well you right.

About 5 kilometres outside of Zeerust I was flagged down by a traffic cop on the side of the road and after panicking for a minute discovered that he had been sent out by the Beares Manager in Zeerust to escort Buddy and Me into town!! Phew sweated there for a moment, because I was running a little late and did not have time to chat with the traffic cops as they usually do; in-spite of the fact that I usually enjoy our road side chats.

When we arrived outside the Beares store ‘Buddy and Me’ were greeted by a horde of kids from a local school shouting “Hello Buddy and Steve” at the tops of their voices  

 it was absolutely amazing!!!

 While in Zeerust I got to meet, apart from a few other people, an incredibly interesting young lady by the name of Berdine (and yes that is spelt right) Venter,

 who is a Social Worker with an organisation called ‘NG Welfare Zeerust’ which is an organisation under the umbrella of the ‘Dutch Reformed Church’ and which provides support in the form of legal, medical and counselling support to victims of child rape and general abuse. We spent hours, and when I say hours, I mean hours, from 1:30 till 4:50 in the afternoon, talking about the child rape situation and all the consequences this disgusting crime has on our society.

She provided me with details of a case which involves four small kids, all from the same family, which she and her organisation have been investigating, privately at huge cost, for the past 2 years, the details of which are shocking and I will be posting a blog soon regarding this case. After my chat with Berdine I came to the conclusion that this young lady was not only put on earth for a specific reason to help children, but was brought to Zeerust for the specific reason to help these kids. So Berdine keep up the amazing work you are doing, you are a very special person.

Because of the intensity of our chat, by the time we finished and I had bid the Beares staff farewell, it was almost 5:15 which meant that I had a night drive through to Rustenburg, but the delay because of the chat was well worth it, and apart from the fact that Buddy’s head lights are atrocious, it was freezing cold, so generally not a nice drive, but I arrived in one piece and managed to link up with my host for the night, Round Tabler Heindrich Schulze who I followed to his abode, my ‘home’ for the next two nights.  We were then joined by Round Tablers Shaun Harris (a 41ner ou-man) and RT Marius Lubbe for a braai.

 But before I finish this story about the braai, I must tell you about something’s which I learnt about my host: 1) Heindrich has an absolutely amazing little Jack Russell dog named ‘Sharky’

 (Which is obviously a very good name for a brilliant minded animal) which does the most amazing things with stones and golf balls and literally runs around Heindrich’s shoulders. 2) Heindrich is a man who does not buy ‘Tabasco Sauce’ by the little ‘woosey’ 200 whatever gram bottles, but buys them by the

 jug!!! He, I am told, by a very ‘good – reliable source’, even has ‘Tabasco Sauce’ with his ‘Post-Toasties’!!!

 So now back to the business of the project. So after a really enjoyable evening, the next morning I headed for the Beares store where I met all the friendly people of Beares Rustenburg,

 and after spending some quality time chatting to them I headed for the ‘David Brink Primary School’ where the Head Master, Mr v/d Westhuizen afforded firstly a top rate SAPS-FCS unit member, Warrant Officer Thinus Else the opportunity to talk and who later introduced me. I was then afforded the privilege of chatting to a crowd of nearly 900 kids, ranging from grade 1 to grade 7.

I think I can honestly say that after having addressed many kids at schools across South Africa, I have never spoken at a school where the kids were so engrossed by what I was saying, it was truly a mind boggling experience. When I finished speaking, the kid’s queued up to get my autograph, incredible!!!

During one discussion with the police I was told of the latest, absolutely ridiculous bit of legislation which has hit our law books, and that is, that the police are no longer allowed to publish photo’s or identikit pictures of suspects who they are looking for in connection with crimes being investigated. Evidently this is now considered to be “unconstitutional” and contravenes the ‘individuals’ (suspects) rights!!!

Another interesting discussion was surrounding our esteemed government / legislators decision to produce a piece of legislation in the form of the ‘Child Justice Act’ (Act 75 / 2008) which excludes children under the age of 10 years-of-age of any criminal capacity, in other words a child under the age of 10 years of age can commit an offence / crime and not be held criminally responsible. Section 9 (1) of the Act states that should a child be suspected of having committed an offence, he or she may not be arrested but has to be handed over into the care of his/her parents. Should it be established that the child did in-fact commit the offence the child must under go the ‘Diversion Programme’, which in effect is counselling, and nothing further happens to the child!!

I have held discussions with members of the police service across the length and breadth of South Africa and I have heard so many story’s involving crimes being committed by children in this age category, and these crimes include, rape of children, including the rape of small babies, robbery and house breaking and even murder, and it burns my ass every time I hear that because of the ‘Child Justice Act’ these kids are regarded to ‘above the law’. Two specific cases which spring to mind is one in Lamberts Bay where two boys, aged 8 and 9 years of age, raped a small girl of 5 very badly and then beat her to death with a metal pipe. The second was in Vredendal where three boys, aged between 7 and 9 years of age raped a boy of 6 and then forced a branch from a tree into him via his rectum. In both instances nothing happened to the little ‘savages’ and they have been placed in the ‘Diversion Programme’.

I am very sorry to say, but I believe that if these little ‘savages’ can do these crimes, then they must suffer the full consequences of their actions, they know that what they did was wrong and so must be held accountable and responsible for their actions.

Our esteemed government in the form of the legislators in 1998, changed the rape act and excluded the rape of a male from the rape act. The rape of a male, be it an adult male or a child then fell under the ‘Sexual Abuse Act’ which attracted a maximum sentence on conviction of 12 months imprisonment, and in-spite of much lobbying, the government chose to change the rape act and so excluded the rape of a male from the act, the consequences of this resulted in a massive increase in the rape or ‘sexual abuse’ of small boys. After 9 years the government realised they had made a booboo and rewrote the rape act in the form of the ‘Sexual Offences Act – Act 32/2007’ and the rape of a male was once again included into the legal definition of rape.

I personally, and my views are shared by many individuals across South Africa, including members of the SAPS, and Social Workers, believe that by removing the criminal capacity of a child under the age of 10 years of age, we will be breading another generation of criminals.

So now that I have dealt with those bits of the legal / justice system, which have been discussed at length with many individuals on my travels, off my chest, let me carry on with where ‘Buddy and Me’ have been travelling.

While braaing with the Round Tablers of Rustenburg, I boasted about how great Buddy’s new rear tail lights are, the ones fitted by my son-in-law Zac down in Pinetown. Of course they wanted me to show them how bright the lights are and of course I obliged. A problem arose when after showing them how the tail lights and indicators practically light up the neighbourhood, I pushed the brake pedal and discovered that the brake lights weren’t working!!!!, so the next morning I spent some time trying to locate the problem before heading out to Thabazimbi. Unfortunately after checking the fuses and globes I could not get them to work and so took a chance driving to Thabazimbi with no brake lights, praying all the way that I would not be stopped by traffic cops and end up with a fine.

On arriving in Thabazimbi I immediately headed for my ‘new home’ which was a lovely B&B owned by a magic couple Marietjie and Paul Conradie called ‘El-Shadai’.

 So if ever you find yourself visiting Thabazimbi, there is only one place to stay, and that is ‘El-Shadai B&B’ and you can contact Marietjie or Paul on 014 – 772 3389 or 083 800 8014 or email them on elshadaibb@polka.co.za. You can also check them out on the website: www.tourismgrading.co.za

The next day after spending some time chatting to the Beares staff,

I headed for the police station where I wanted to see their ‘Victim Support Room (VSR)’. I was pointed in the direction of the ‘VSR’ which is in a building next to the police station, but when I tried to enter I discovered that the room was locked. On making enquiries I was told that the lady manning the centre “had gone to town’. I was also told that she could not be contacted to find out when she would be back so I could either wait or come back later, my thought, “mmm what if I was a mother with a small child who had been raped”.

I decided to return to ‘El-Shadai’ and spend the time trying to locate the problem with Buddy’s brake lights and walla!!!, I discovered that the wires which are supposed to be attached to the brake master cylinder, at the end of the brake pedal, had come off, so once again Buddy was road worthy and legal.

I returned an hour later only to find the situation had not changed. Three quarters of an hour later on arriving at the ‘VSR’ the doors were still locked, no one available to help me. After a further 15 minutes of standing around I was just about to climb into Buddy and give up when a young lady arrived and called me, she was the lady I was waiting for.

At this point there is another point of contention I have to mention, and that is the ‘Victim Support Room’s’ which are being established at all the police stations, or rather most of the police stations, around the country. In many instances I have been told by members of the communities that they have established ‘VSR’s’ at their local police stations, at their own costs, and that within a few months of the ‘VSR’ being opened, on visiting the ‘VSR’s’ it has been discovered that the beds, blankets, TV’s etc are ‘missing’. The ‘VSR’ at the Thabazimbi police station however is probably the best I have seen to date.

At the Thabazimbi ‘VSR’ I met a really dedicated police officer in the form of Warrant Officer Corra Myburgh who confirmed that child rape is occurring at a pretty mean rate in the area, and she also confirmed that the far majority of cases are not being reported. After providing her with the details of my proposed ‘solution’ she promised to read my proposal for a solution and to provide me with her opinion and comments, so Corra I am looking forward to receiving your comments and opinions.  She did however also confirm that the conviction rate on child rape in their area is very low and that it falls pretty much in line with South Africa’s pathetic national conviction rate on child rape of 4 – 6%. She went on to say that in fact if a case involves the rape of a small child, as in below the age of 6, the chances of obtaining a conviction is zero! And even in the case of older kids, as in 6 -12 years of age, if there is no semen / DNA the chances of obtaining a conviction is also ZERO!!!

So why are these ‘savages’ raping the children??? BECAUSE THEY ARE GETTING AWAY WITH IT, AND OUR GOVERNMENT IS DOING ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO STOP THEM!!!!!!! And now the police are not even allowed to publish photo’s of the child rapists to get the publics help to apprehend them and remove them from our society!!

My next port of call was to the town of Modimolle (Nylstroom) where I once again had the opportunity to meet with some really interesting people, amongst whom was an amazing lady by the name of Gezina Lombard who is involved in the management of the ‘Abraham Kriel Children’s Home’. The Home provides accommodation and a support structure for abused children, as in abuse in many different forms which includes, sexual abuse, rape as well as physical and emotional abuse. I heard some pretty heart wrenching stories of kids who have been admitted to the home and one particular story hit me pretty deep, and that was of a little girl who at the tender age of 6 was savagely raped by her step-father and was found by her mother in the bath in a large pool of her own blood. So to Gezina you have my absolute admiration for the job you and your colleagues are doing, you are all angels in my book.  

As usual I got to meet a horde of kids and as usual Buddy was roped into the day’s activities.

 So to Johan Coetzee, the Beares store Manager in Modimolle a great big thanks to you and your friendly staff for making my visit to Modimolle such a great and informative one.

 From Modimolle ‘Buddy and Me’ took the road to Mokopane (Potgietersrus) where I was kindly hosted accommodation for the week-end by the lovely Protea ‘The Park’ Hotel, and the Front Office Manager Dudu Nxumalo and her staff ensured that my three night stay was an absolutely amazing one.

That’s Dudu on my left.

 My weekend involved meeting some really great people, firstly in the form of a couple, Bob Saayman and Jean Dunn who are touring around the country in their 4X4 and caravan and who I met at the O’Hagan’s pub in Mokopane while watching the Springboks get a thrashing by Australia in the opening match of the Tri-Nations rugby tournament.

 This is what they had to say in their website blog:

 23-07-2011 Mokopane.

Flags flying half-mast, tears flowing, the defeat of the beloved “bokkies” will remain a bitter memory to many. Players and selectors, no doubt to be further ripped to pieces and devoured by the critics with the gusto of hyenas.

Sitting in an almost empty O Hagan’s Pub did not require the skills of lip reading to interpret the profanities muttered by the viewers. Suggestions to aid the bokkies in moral support ranged from; sheep on the side of the field to distract the Aussies, or, bring on the local school-boy team, tell them they are playing for a belated birthday gift for Nelson Mandela’s 93rd birthday, memories of his 1995 World Cup involvement in mind. I guess long hours will be spent at the drawing board at the Bok camp.

Where the rugby results proved a dismal affair, the meeting of a gentleman by the name of Steve Heath in the pub turned out to be a very pleasant encounter. Firstly, it was refreshing to happenstance upon an English spoken gentleman, quick of wit and well-spoken in the land of Afrikanderdom. The interesting part about Steve is that, he gave up his high position and corporate life style to dedicate his life to research work in the fight against the rape and sexual abuse of children. Traveling through 10 African countries and virtually every town in South Africa in his trusted beach-buggy affectionately known as “Buddy,” he interviews victims, NGO’s, police, magistrates and the rapists themselves, in search of a solution to this scourge. Steve receives no financial gain what-so-ever, for this worthy quest of his. In fact, all it needs is your support to “spread the word” simply by e-mailing Steve’s web site and mail addresses to friends and colleagues, be they local or international. For more information on Steve and the noble work he is doing to improve our society I call on all our followers to visit his web-site: www.buddyandme.co.za or, e-mail him at steve@buddyandme.co.za  for every hit received on his web, one of the sponsors will donate one USD to this worthy cause. Steve can also be found on Facebook.

As to the rest of the day; nothing more exciting than to slink home and sulk about the bokkies defeat down under. Since no pics were taken today, I again resort to my random selection from the collection but, remember; what delights us in the visible beauty is the invisible.

                                                                                                            ——————————————

So many thanks for that Bob and Jean and I wish you enjoyable and safe travelling and I hope to meet up with you guys again, some where in South Africa, keep well and stay safe.

 

The other great people I met in Mokopane were the guys at the SUPA QUICK outlet. Buddy’s front left tyre has worn down and is barely legal, so Marius Knoetze and the boys at SUPA QUICK Mokopane kindly swopped my spare tyre for the one on the front rim, because the spare rim is slightly buckled from the terrible pot holes ‘Buddy and Me’ have been subjected to, and so now we are one hundred % legal again Yahoo!!!!

 So meet the great guys of SUPA QUICK Mokopane, that’s Marius with the stripped ‘Long-shorts’.

Sunday was spent with the Round Tablers of Mokopane or rather ‘Kameeldoring’ RT 92 and our hosts for the day and braai were Gerhard and Helena Hennings. Their farm is about ten kilometres outside Mokopane and I can only describe it as absolute heaven on earth. So meet the crazy guys and ladies of Round table Kameeldoring (Mokopane).

Our hosts, Gerhard – with the white and blue shirt on the right of the picture (I won’t mention the ugly ‘blue bull’ on his shirt) and the lovely Helena seated in the front with the green blouse. Thanks guys you made my visit to Mokopane an absolutely wonderful experience and I can’t wait to return to spend some quality relaxing time in your bush camp in January when the ‘Buddy and Me’ project 3 finishes and I need a place to relax, unwind and plan ‘Buddy and Me’ project 4.

 

Of course the guys had to do all the hard work for the braai, like drink beer, and braai the meat, while the ladies relaxed

Someone, on my face book, when I posted this particular photo, commented about “The thorn between the roses” I’m not going to name this person, but I will get my revenge “Wonder Woman”.

The Round Tablers of Kameeldoring also spent some time redecorating Buddy and this was the result.

 So if you click on the picture and open it you will see the ‘buck’ horns on the front bumper and the Warthog skull and tusks mounted on top of the rear spare wheel. Unfortunately, on my way ‘home’ to the Protea ‘The Park’ Hotel, I stopped of at the filling station and was mortified to discover that the kids who were attracted to Buddy were petrified of the Warthog skull and a couple ran away screaming, so unfortunately I was forced to remove the Warthog skull, because Buddy does a fantastic job in attracting kids and I can’t afford to have them running away mortified by the sight of the Warthog skull. But I compensated by removing the tusks and mounting them on the panel above the windscreen. Secondly on entering town a cop stopped me and pointed out that the ‘buck’ horns mounted on the front are in fact regarded as dangerous and “must be removed” he did however accept that mounted on the rear spare wheel was “acceptable” so hence the changes to the Round Tablers decorations.

And so ended my week-end in Mokopane (Potgietersrus), I was intending to write something in response to an article that was mentioned on my face book about an article which was published by a gentleman in Nelspruit by the name of David Beresford, who wrote an article about the fact that child rape is occurring because of the impact of the ridiculous allegations made by Sangoma’s that “sex with a virgin child will cure HIV/AIDS”.

My research over the past 6 years has confirmed and in-fact proves that HIV/AIDS is playing a major role in the rape of children; however it is not for the reason of curing HIV/AIDS. Unfortunately this blog has proved to be much longer than I thought it would be and Julia must be pulling her lovely golden locks out because of the blogs length and the number of pictures I have posted on it, so I will write about the effects and implications of HIV/AIDS on the rape of children in my next blog, so stay tuned for some mind boggling facts on this subject.

So until my next blog hits the streets, keep well, stay safe and keep your feet on the ground but reach real high for the stars, and above all keep the children safe!!

Caring regards from

Buddy (The Beach Buggy)

and

Me’ (Steve Heath)

Please send your comments and opinions to: steve@buddyandme.co.za

Please note, that all comments and opinions on the ‘Buddy and Me’ website and blogs are those of Steve Heath and not those of the sponsors to the ‘Buddy and Me’ project.

Blog 45 Buddy and Me Schedule – 21st July – 29th August 2011

Who Is Steve Heath
A Message To The President of South Africa.
Factors Contributing To The Increase In Child Rape.
A Proposed Solution To Stopping The Rape And Sexual Abuse Of Children in SA.

To watch Buddy and Me in real time click here, select South Africa under “Global Fleet Logins:” in the left hand panel, enter cellphone number 0822549129 and password Buddy.

To make a donation to or information on any of the organisations involved in assisting victims of child rape and abuse, please click on one of the following links:

Beares
Lubners
Bobbi Bear Foundation (KwaZulu-Natal)
The Teddy Bear Clinic (Gauteng)
The TygerBear Foundation (Western Cape)
GRIP (Mpumalanga)
StepThru (Gauteng)

 ‘Buddy and Me’

   Itinerary

                                  For the period 21st July – 29th August 2011

                                     

Store Beares/Lubners  Date at store Time at store
Thabazimbi Beares 21 July 10:00 – 13:00
Modimolle (Nylstroom) Beares 22 July 13:00 – 15:30
Mokopane (Potgietersrus) Beares 25 July 10:00 – 12:30
Polokwane Beares 26 July 10:00 – 12:00
Polokwane Lubners 26 July 12:30 – 14:30
Makhado (Louis Trichardt) Beares 28 July 10:00 – 12:30
Musina Beares 29 July 10:00 – 12:30
Tzaneen Beares 1 Aug 10:30 – 12:30
Tzaneen Lubners 1 Aug 13:00 – 14:30
Phalaborwa Beares 3 Aug 10:00 – 13:00
Hoedspruit Beares 4 Aug 10:30 – 13:00
Burgersfort Lubners 17 Aug 11:00 – 13:30
Lydenburg Beares 18 Aug 12:00 – 14:30
Hazyview Beares 19 Aug 10:00 – 13:00
Nelspruit Beares 22 Aug 10:30 – 13:00
Malelane Beares 23 Aug 10:00 – 12:30
Nkomazi Plaza Beares 23 Aug 13:30 – 15:30
Barberton Beares 24 Aug 12:00 – 15:00
Belfast Beares 26 Aug 10:00 – 12:30
Groblersdal Beares 29 Aug 12:30 – 15:00

Blog 44 – Buddy and Me – Project 3 (23rd July 2011)

Who Is Steve Heath
A Message To The President of South Africa.
Factors Contributing To The Increase In Child Rape.
A Proposed Solution To Stopping The Rape And Sexual Abuse Of Children in SA.

To watch Buddy and Me in real time click here, select South Africa under “Global Fleet Logins:” in the left hand panel, enter cellphone number 0822549129 and password Buddy.

To make a donation to or information on any of the organisations involved in assisting victims of child rape and abuse, please click on one of the following links:

Beares
Lubners
Bobbi Bear Foundation (KwaZulu-Natal)
The Teddy Bear Clinic (Gauteng)
The TygerBear Foundation (Western Cape)
GRIP (Mpumalanga)
StepThru (Gauteng)

This blog is dedicated to some interesting information I was provided with regard to the trauma associated with the sexual abuse of children and how this can influence a child’s future life with regard to sexuality.

HOW TRAUMA SHAPES SEXUALITY

January 7th, 2011 | Author | 0 Comments »

HOW TRAUMA SHAPES SEXUALITY

Why would a woman who was sexually abused as a child have rape and submission fantasies that sexually excite her as an adult?  Why would another woman who suffered physical abuse as a child now enjoy role-playing dominant/submissive sex games?  Why would a man raped or taunted by classmates as an adolescent now be unable to perform sexually or another man who was repeatedly berated by an emotionally abusive parent now not be able to approach women socially or sexually?   These scenarios are not unusual; in fact, they are among the most common examples of how childhood trauma can shape adult sexual behavior.

Various studies (i.e. Wolfe, Gentile & Wolfe, 1989) have confirmed higher rates of Post Traumatic Stress (PTSD) in sexually abused children.  These survivors display re-experiencing symptoms, including intrusive thoughts and flashbacks and becoming involved in relationships that repeat the sexually abusive behavior they originally suffered.  Additionally, it is estimated that “about four out of five abuse survivors experience disturbing sexual fantasies” (Wendy Maltz M.S.W.) which color their sexual predilections.  Maltz says that it is not surprising that the repercussions of abuse manifest themselves as issues of sexuality, since it was sexuality that was abused in the first place.

When we experience trauma in life, we associate those emotions with certain sensations and thoughts that were present during the traumatic episodes.  So if our young, innocent bodies instinctively responded to coercive sexual acts – acts that we really didn’t understand or acts that confused us because of how and with whom it was happening – then we might later, as adults, unconsciously connect the event with the feeling (the body remembers).  Consequently, coercive sex could actually become a signal to the body to respond sexually, even to the point of orgasm.  In fact, “some survivors find that their only path to sexual release is fantasizing victimization.”  (H. Smith, 2009).

There are a host of factors that contribute to the eventual sexual behavior of adult survivors, including degree of abuse, duration of abuse, abuser’s relationship to the victim, age when abused, rituals involved and whether or not the abuse became public knowledge and then how it was then dealt with by other parental figures.   Some adult survivors avoid sex; others engage in it promiscuously, while others simply numb themselves (or disassociate) during sex.   Those are among the most common general reactions that survivors have to sex.   But there has been very little research about how the abuse specifically shapes the sexual desires and fantasies of victims.  One such study conducted by Meston, Herman & Trapnell (1999), showed a relationship between early abuse and adult sexual behavior in the following areas – frequency of masturbation, range of sexual fantasies, masochism, promiscuity and voyeurism.

Another study by Finklehor & Browne (1985) – the most comprehensive study to date – identifies a “theory of sexual traumatization”.   Briefly, the theory posits that through a variety of means, childhood sexual abuse shapes sexuality creating unusual emotional associations to sexual activities and a repertoire of sexualized behaviors that seem inappropriate or disturbing.  These behaviors may have been learned during the period of abuse or in some manner are associated with the abuse and are now used as a strategy for manipulating others.  What the theory didn’t state is that they may now also be used as a way to self stimulate.

More empirical evidence could help survivors with the shame and guilt they experience over both their sexual reactions during the abuse and their sexual behavior (inclinations) later.

Roni Weisberg-Ross   L.M.F.T. 2010

http://www.wellness.com

blogs/rweisberg/4370/how-trauma-shapes-sexuality/r111ni-weisburg-ross-lmft